爱华网笑话一般比较短小,喜剧性很强,能够使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松。本文是有关于简单的英语笑话，希望对大家有帮助!
有关于简单的英语笑话：汽车
Father: I promised to buy you a car if you passed your examination, and you have failed. What were you doing last term?
父亲：我曾向你许诺，如果你考试及格就给你买俩小汽车，可你却未能做到。你上学期一直在干什么呀?
Son: I was learning to drive a car.
儿子：我在学开汽车。
有关于简单的英语笑话：Good News And Bad News
"There's good news and bad news," the divorce lawyer told his client.
"I could sure use some good news," sighed the client. "What's it?"
"Your wife isn't demanding that your future inheritances be included in the settlement."
"And the bad news?"
"After the divorce, she's marrying your father."
好消息和坏消息
“有好消息，也有坏消息，”离婚律师告诉他的当事人。
“我总能听到一些好消息吧，”当事人叹了口气说，“是什么好消息?”
“你妻子没有要求将你未来的继承财产也划入裁决的范围。”
“那么坏消息呢?”
“离婚以后，她将与你父亲结婚。”
有关于简单的英语笑话：First Flight第一次坐飞机
Mr. Johnson had never been up in an aerophane before and he had read a lot about air accidents, so one day when a friend offered to take him for a ride in his own small phane, Mr. Johnson was very worried about accepting. Finally, however, his friend persuaded him that it was very safe, and Mr. Johnson boarded the plane.
约翰逊先生从前未乘过飞机，他读过许多关于飞行事故的报道。所以，有一天一位朋友邀请他乘自己的小飞机飞行时，约翰逊先生非常担心，不敢接受。不过，由于朋友不断保证说飞行是很安全的，约翰逊先生终于被说服了，登上了飞机。
His friend started the engine and began to taxi onto the runway of the airport. Mr. Johnson had heard that the most dangerous part of a flight were the take-off and the landing, so he was extremely frightened and closed his eyes.
他的朋友启动引擎开始在机场跑道上滑行。约翰逊先生听说飞行中最危险的是起飞与降落，所以他吓得紧闭双眼。
After a minute or two he opened them again, looked out of the window of the plane, and said to his friend, "Look at those people down there. They look as small as ants, don't they?"
过了一两分钟，他睁开双眼朝窗外望去，接着对朋友说道：“看下面那些人，他们看起来就象蚂蚁一样小，是不是?”
"Those are ants," answered his friend. "We're still on the ground." “那些就是蚂蚁，”他的朋友答道，“我们还在地面上。”
有关于简单的英语笑话：有多少人
An American stepped into a gun shop,"Give me the most powerful pistol."
"How many bullets do you need?"
The American walked to a telephone booth,"Hello. Is that the bank? How many people do you have,Please?"
一个美国人走进枪支商店:"给我拿一支威力最大的手枪."
"您需要多少发子弹?"
那个美国人走到公用电话间旁打电话:"喂,银行吗?请问你们有多少人?"
有关于简单的英语笑话：座位
"Excuse me,but the seat you've taken is mine."
"Yours?Can you prove it?"
"Yes,I put a cup of ice cream on it."
"请原谅,你占了我的位置."
"你的位置?你能征明这点吗?"
"能,我在位置上放了杯冰激凌."
