你对成功的定义是一个致命错误吗?
有些人用薪水定义成功。对另一些人来说,成功是名片上的头衔。其它人也许根据赞誉和奖励来定义。
对于很多人来说,问题在于,让他们改变自己对于成功的定义是不可能的。看看那些因为损失钱财而自杀的商人,想想被解雇后带了一只枪回公司的员工。
当然,这些都是极端例子。并不是每个人在生计受到威胁的时候会自杀或杀人。但这的确说明,也许我们需要重新定义成功。
首先,完成这个句子:“成功对我而言是……”
当你完成了这个句子,然后重新审视一下,你是否处于取得这种成功的轨道上。如果你明天失去工作或钱财,你对成功的定义还有效吗?你会认为自己是一个失败者吗?
我曾长期从事一份有压力的工作,情绪无常的老板让人心力交瘁,至少让局势紧张。一天,同事交谈时,我感到筋疲力尽。我觉得非常不满、沮丧甚至是愤怒。突然萌生一个想法:如果我那天死了,我可不愿意我的墓志铭只有一句:“总能按时完成任务。”
呃,我思考着,我希望生活有更多意义。数月后,我开始对生活做出一些切实改变,让我更能平衡生活,而不只是把时间和精力花在工作上。
时下不景气,有些人开始惊恐。但是我认为这是一个千载难逢的机会,让你认真思考你的生活中什么是重要的,并剔除那些不要紧的东西。
只有你自己能为自己定义成功。有一点我清楚:你不只意味着一个头衔,不只意味着工资单上的数字,也不只意味着挂在墙上的那个奖励。为了到达你心中的目的地,你一定得走这样一条路吗?只有你能回答。
Is your definition of success a fatal mistake?
For some, success is defined in terms of the dollar amount on a paycheck. For others, it's the title on their business card. Others may define success in terms of the accolades and awards they have won.
But the problem with how people define success these days is that when they're forced to change it, they can't. Look at the businessmen who have committed suicide because they have lost fortunes. Consider the workers who are fired and then go back to work, armed with a gun.
Extreme cases, sure. Not everyone considers killing themselves or others when their livelihood is threatened. But it does point out that maybe we need to revisit our own definition of success.
Start by completing this definition: "Success to me is…"
After you complete this sentence, then review it and determine if you're on the path to achieving that success. If you were to lose your job or money tomorrow, would your definition of success still be valid? Or, would you consider yourself a failure?
I remember a job where I worked long, stressful hours and often labored for a boss who had mood swings like a freaking roller coaster. It made for a tense situation, to say the least. One day I was talking to a co-worker and the exhaustion was overwhelming. I felt so dissatisfied, frustrated and even angry. Then it hit me: If I died that day, I didn't want the only thing on my tombstone to be "Always met her deadlines."
Ugh, I remember thinking. I wanted my life to account for more than that. It wasn't until months later that I started making some real changes in my life, changes that I know made me much better able to balance my life and devote time and effort to more than my job.
Right now, times are tough and some of us are beginning to panic. But I think it's a golden opportunity to really think about what is important in your life, and weed out the things that don't really matter.
You are the one who must define what success is to you. One thing I know for sure: You are more than a job title, you are worth more than a number on a paycheck and you are more than an award to hang on your wall. Is the destination you have in mind worth the road you must travel? Only you can answer that.