爱华网笑话内含着丑与美的矛盾冲突,反映了严肃主题,充满平民大众朴素的审美理想。下面是小编带来的短篇英语笑话，欢迎阅读!
短篇英语笑话精选
期末考试(中英)
Maxine, the platinum blonde, reported for her final examination which consisted of Yes/No answers. She took her seat in the examination hall, stared at the question paper, and then in a bit of inspiration, took a quarter out of her purse. She started tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet" Yes" for heads and "No" for tails. Within 30 minutes she was all done whereas the rest of the class was still sweating it out. During the last few minutes of the exam period，Maxine frantically started flipping the coin again.
麦西尼有一头银白色秀发，正在参加期末考试，试卷上的题目只有“对”和“不对”两种答案。她在考场里坐了下来开始答卷，这时她灵机一动，从钱包里拿出了一枚两角五分的硬币，往上抛硬币，出现正面就填“对”，反面就填“不对”。只用了30分钟的时间，她就做完了，而此时别的同学还在冥思苦想。但离考试完毕还有最后几分钟时，麦西尼又开始疯狂地抛硬币。
The moderator, concerned about what she was doing, stopped by her desk and asked if she was ok.
监考官对她的所作所为很好奇，便走到她的桌旁，问她是否有问题。
"Oh yes, I' m fine. I finished the exam a half hour ago一but,”explaining the frantic coin tossing, "I' m going back through and checking my answers!”
“我还好，半小时前我就答完了，现在我想从后往前的再检查一遍。”她这样解释抛硬币的原因。
短篇英语笑话阅读
金婚纪念日(中英)
A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. Their domestic tranquility had long been the talk of the town. A local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret of their long and happy marriage.
一对夫妇正在庆祝他们的金婚纪念日，他们多年平静的生活，成为小镇上流传的佳话，一个小报记者要求采访他们这段长久而幸福的婚姻的秘密。
"Well，it dates back to our honeymoon,”explained the man. "We visited the Grand Canyon and took a trip down to the bottom on the canyon by pack mule. We hadn’t gone too far when my wife's mule stumbled. My wife quietly said, ‘That's once' .We proceeded a little further and the mule stumbled again. Once more my wife quietly said, `That's twice.’We hadn't gone a half一mile when the mule stumbled the third time. My wife quietly removed a revolver from her pocket and shot the mule dead. I started to protest over her treatment of the mule when she looked at me and quietly said, `That's once'.”
“这要从我们的蜜月说起，”男的说，“我们去旅行了大峡谷，而且用骡子驮着行李走到了谷底，我们没有走多远，我妻子的骡子就跌倒了，妻子平静地说:‘这是一次’。我们继续走远了一些，骡子又跌倒了，我妻子又平静地说:‘这是第二次’。我们又走了不到半里，骡子第三次跌倒，我妻子从背包里拿出了手枪，射死了那头骡子。始想去阻止她这样对待那头骡子，可她看着我平静地说‘这是第一次”，。
短篇英语笑话学习
讣告(中英)
A man died and his wife phoned the newspaper to place an obituary. She called the obituary department and said, "This is what I want to print: Bernie is dead.” The man at the newspaper said, "But for $25 you are allowed to print six words.” The woman answered, "OK. Then print: Bernie is dead. Toyota for sale.”
一个男人死了，他的妻子给报社打电话要刊登一个讣告。她接通了负责刊登讣告的部门的电话说:“我想刊登这句话:博尼死了。”报社负责人说:"25美元您可以刊登6个字。”妻子想了想说:“好吧，那就这样登:博尼死了，本田车出售。”
短篇英语笑话欣赏
运气太差(中英)
Sadie's husband Jake has been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet his faithful wife stays by his bedside day and night.
莎迪的丈夫杰克已经昏迷好几个月了，他忠实的妻子不分昼夜地陪在他的床边。
one night, Jake comes to and motions for her to come closer. He says, "My Sadie, you have been with me through all the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. You know what, Sadie?"
一天晚上，杰克苏醒过来，示意他的妻子离近些，然后他说:“我的莎迪，你和我一起历经了多少的苦难呀，当我失业的时候，你在一旁支持我;当我生意失败的时候，你在一旁陪伴我;当我被打伤的时候，你在一旁陪伴我;当我们失去房产时，你在一旁陪伴我;当我生病的时候，你依旧在我的身边。你知道吗，莎迪?”
"What dear?" she asked gently.
“什么，亲爱的?”莎迪轻声地问。
"I think you're bad luck.”
“我觉得你的运气太差了。”
