爱华网CARTER [IN VOICEO VER]: Edward Perriman Cole died in May.
It was a Sunday afternoon, and there wasn't a cloud in thesky.
It's difficult to understand the sum of a person's life.
Some people will tell you it's measured by the ones leftbehind.
Some believe it can be measured in faith.
Some say by love.
Other folks say life has no meaning at all.
Me?
I believe that you measure yourself...
...by the people who measured themselves by you.
What I can tell you for sure is that, by any measure...
...Edward Cole lived more in his last days on Earth...
...than most people manage to wring out of a lifetime.
I know that when he died, his eyes were closed...
...and his heart was open.
MAN 1: "Name the five presidents whose last names begin with theletter H."
H?
Warren G. Harding, Rutherford B. Hayes, Herbert Hoover...
...and the two Harrisons, Benjamin and William Henry.
Ah.
Thought I'd get you with the double Harrisons.
CARTER:Ha-ha-ha. -You're sick, you know?
You think that's sick, can you name their wives?
- No. -Neither can I.
MAN 2: Yo, Cartey-car! CARTER: Yo!
- When they need the Camaro,man? -Yesterday.
MAN 2: Huh?
- All right, I got one for you. CARTER: All right.
Who invented the radio?
Ah.
That's a hard one.
- What do you know, I finally got you. CARTER: No.
I don't know if you want who they think invented theradio...
...or the person who actually invented the radio.
Well, in here it says...
Marconi, right?
Yeah, it ain't him?
He's the one they generally think invented the radio.
In fact, he got a Nobel Prize for it in 1909.
Truth is a guy named Nikola Tesla...
...patented the basic idea for the radio in 1896.
Same idea Marconi used for his patent several years later.
[PHONE RINGING]
Tesla fought Marconi till the day he died in 1943.
Same year the Supreme Court ruled...
...that Marconi's patent was invalid...
...recognizing Tesla as the inventor of the radio.
Carter.
You really are sick.
Oh, hi, Ginnie.
Well, good. About time. What did they say?
All right, what does that mean?
Kopi Luwak. The rarest beverage in the world.
Take a whiff.
Go ahead.
[CHAIRMAN CLEARS THRO AT]
Uh, Mr. Cole, the board is ready to hear your proposal.
Hold on just a second.
Go ahead. Go on.
Well?
Really good.
Really good.
Mr. Cole. Sir?
Do you know what a Philistine is, Jim?
Sir, it's Richard.
That's right, Phil. Give them the spiel.
RICHARD: Thank you, Mr. Chairman, fellow supervisors.
We at the Cole Group feel the decline of the WinwoodHospital...
...is a direct result of significant fiscal mismanagement.
- I beg your pardon, thishospital... -Overhead costs are nearly double.
Your lease and land costs were similarly overbid.
Donations have atrophied to the point you've fallen far behindthe curve...
...in Research, Pediatrics, Oncology and MRI.
The Cole Group has privatized 15 public hospitals in sevenyears...
...each of which now provides, or will soon provide...
...the highest standard of medical care to theircommunities.
- Despite being grosslyunderstaffed?- The better the doctor, the need...
What about beds? There are rumors...
...you increased the number of patients to the point ofoverpopulation.
Patient density has always been...
And your emergency rooms, I mean, they are known...
I run hospitals, not health spas.
Two beds to a room, no exceptions.
Look, I passed up a lunch with Michelle Pfeiffer to behere...
...so can we desist from all of this inane posturing?
Boys and girls, you need me.
I do not need you.
Now, there's a sizeable check in this envelope...
...let me know if you decide to cash it.
[COUGHING]
Mr. Cole, are you all right?
[WOMAN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY O VER PA]
What are you doing here?
Oh, you know, fighting for my life. You?
Uh, no, I was just surprised...
EDWARD: -And I don't care about the insurance!
And tell Dr. Shit-for-Brains...
...I wanna know everything about this bleomycin drip he wants toget me on.
I hear it eats your lungs.
When I address Congress next month...
...I don't want to do it breathing through a hole in mythroat.
- That's not exactly whathappens. -Who the hell is this guy?
- Where's Thomas? Tom!- In plain view, sir.
- Hi, Tom.- We're gonna move you into the bed.
I can do it myself. I ain't dead yet.
[CHUCKLES]
[GRUNTS]
How about now?
Have I fired you lately?
Not since the Oprah incident.
- That was a good one.Ha-ha-ha. -Yeah, it's good stuff.
Who the hell is that?
Who the hell are you?
He said, "Who the hell...?"
Oh, God. What am I, in the morgue?
CARTER: That was the first time I laid eyes on Edward Cole.
An inauspicious beginning, to be sure.
EDWARD: Oh, spare me. Sweet Jesus.
I hate these... I hate tubes!
[EDWARD MUTTERS]
I'll be damned if I'm gonna spend the next three weeks layingnext to this guy.
Zombie boy. Looks half-dead already.
You can't have your own room. It would create an enormous PRproblem.
I don't give a shit about PR.
I want my own room. It's my hospital, for chrissake.
Don't tell me I can't have my own room.
No offense, pal.
You have publicly defended this policy countless times.
You run hospitals, not health spas. Two beds to a room, noexceptions.
I've never been sick before.
Okay, Dr. Eldridge will be in in a minute to dot you up,okay?
Dot me up.
Jesus.
Thomas...
[WHISPERS] ...don't let me wake up paralyzed.
I'll do what I can.
This really your hospital?
Yeah, pretty much.
Might wanna do something about the pea soup.
CARTER: By the morning of the surgery...
...the cancer had spread so far throughout Edward's body...
...that the doctors gave him only a 5 percent chance tosurvive...
...but then, they didn't account for how pissed off they'd madehim.
VIRGINIA: Mm...
No visitors come in to see him?
He's been sleeping a lot since they brought him back.
VIRGINIA: Mm.
That's another reason I don't miss nursing.
It's always so sad seeing a patient like that, all alone...
...after that kind of surgery.
At least he's quiet.
MAN [ON TV]: Day after day, out of sight, and almost outof...
[VIRGINIA CLEARS THRO AT]
Rachel called this morning.
Really? How's she doing?
She's auditioning for first violin in next semester'ssymphony.
[VIRGINIA LAUGHS]
That's wonderful.
Need any more books?
No, I'm... I'm fine.
Got your meds for the night?
Mm-hm. I already took them.
How about pillows?
I'm fine, Virginia, really. Thank you.
You know, I could stay a while if you want me to.
No use both of us being useless in the morning, right?
Okay.
[DOOR CLOSES]
She gone?
What?
As something of a public health expert...
...I believe more people die from visitors...
...than diseases.
MAN [ON TV]: "It's the Berries," for 600.
PRESENTER [ON TV]: This Swedish berry is also known as thecowberry.
- What is a lingonberry? MAN: Uh, what is a lingonberry?
PRESENTER: Correct! MAN: "It's the Berries," for 800.
PRESENTER: In a Top 40 hit of 1956, this "Berry" told Beethovento roll over.
Who is Chuck Berry?
MAN: Who is Chuck Berry? PRESENTER: Yes.
EDWARD: Hey.
Duke?
You mind?
Oh. Sorry. No.
- What is the Mariana Trench? WOMAN: What is the MarianaTrench?
Good morning, Edward.
- Morning.- How you feeling?
Dumb question.
How's that catheter?
Don't know how I ever did without it.
Ah, humor is a good sign.
Kiss my ass.
As is surliness. It's one of your favorite flavors, right?
- Yeah. -Let's see what we got here.
It looks good.
All right, so the operation went well, okay?
All the post-op brain scans are clean.
Now we go after the sarcoma in the rest of your body.
Now, unfortunately, your blood markers are extremely high...
...so I would like to begin chemo this morning.
Love the smell of chemo in the morning.
Apocalypse Now, right?
Makes me feel like victory!
[HOLLINS LAUGHS]
- I'll check in with youlater. - Allright.
Say, doc? Doc?
You think you could just take a look at...?
- Sorry, I'm late. Who's yourdoctor? -He's Dr. Gibian.
I'll let the nurse know.
Appreciate it.
[EDWARD SIGHS]
Bitch, ain't it?
- What are quarks? WOMAN [ON TV]: What are quarks?
- How long you beenhere? -Oh.
In and out over the past few months. Got me on an experimentaltreatment.
- What is the quadratic equation? WOMAN: What is the quadraticequation?
How rough is it?
Chemo?
Not too bad.
If you don't mind around-the-clock vomiting...
...watching your veins turn black...
...and feeling like your bones are made of napalm...
...it's a day at the beach.
That's a relief.
Of course, I hear people react to it differently.
You'll know by tonight.
Tonight?
Listen, um...
...you don't mind my asking...
...what is that contraption you got over there?
It's a siphon. Makes coffee.
What else does it do?
What else does it have to do?
[CARTER CHUCKLES]
Did you know that coffee was originally discovered by a shepherdin Ethiopia?
- You don'tsay. - It'strue.
Seems his goats were eating berries from an unfamiliar bush.
Before long, they were running and jumping all over...
...having a gay old time.
So the shepherd took some of the branches to the localmonastery...
...where the abbots decided to roast them.
When the berries burned...
...the beans inside gave off such a pleasant aroma...
...they brewed them into a stew.
Stew, huh?
And over the next few hundred years, it spread to Arabia,Europe...
...even Sumatra, like that hooch you got over there.
It's called Kopi Luwak.
I know what it's called.
You do?
Never catch me drinking that shit.
Have you ever tried it?
No. I'm more of a instant-coffee man.
Here, here we are.
- Thanks.- No problem.
There you are.
You always had those freckles?
Far as I know.
Nice...
...freckles.
Hmm.
[CARTER CHUCKLES]
THOMAS: Okay, we got prosciutto and melons, some burratamozzarella...
...and a veal paillard.
The folks at Toscana send their best.
You sure you wanna eat all that?
That's the plan.
[CLEARS THRO AT]
What?
Oh, Uh...
You want Thomas to make you a plate?
Tommy, uh, fix a plate for, uh...
Carter.
First name or last?
First.
Really? Interesting.
So you want, uh...? Might cheer you up.
No, thanks, I'll pass.
You sure?
Mm, yum, yum.
Mm-mm.
Best in L.A.
[VOMITING]
It ain't the best in L.A. No more.
[MO ANING]
[RETCHING]
Oh, man.
[CARTER AND ROGER SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
Maya made the honor roll again.
Bet your ass she did.
My God.
Somewhere, some lucky guy's having a heart attack.
Fellas.
Mr. Cole.
EDWARD: Don't pay any attention to me. I'm just, uh, talking tomyself.
It's from Kai.
Says he wants to be a mechanic like his granddad when he growsup.
I hope you talked him out of that.
Well, I tried.
What do we got here?
ROGER: It's a Shelby 350.
[CARTER CHUCKLES]
- I always wanted one ofthose. -Yeah.
- Kairemembered. -Hmm.
Um...
Mom seems to think you're not getting enough rest.
Mm-hm.
She loves you, Pop.
Mm-hm.
Okay.
You'll, uh, call us when you get your test results, huh?
Mm-hm.
If that day ever comes.
Okay.
- Takecare. -Okay.
He your oldest?
Yeah.
What's he do?
- Roger's a taxattorney. -Oh.
Here.
His brother, Lee, is an engineer.
EDWARD: Who's the pretty little lady?
That's Rachel. Youngest of the three.
Big age difference.
Yeah, well, she was a surprise.
We'd hardly gotten the boys out of the house when she camealong.
She's an outstanding violinist.
You got kids?
Depends.
- Never stayed married longenough. - Oh,well...
...don't worry, I've been married long enough for the both ofus.
How's that going?
It's going.
That good, huh?
Well, that's why they invented light switches.
[LAUGHING]
Don't get me wrong, I loved being married, been there fourtimes.
Problem is I love being single too.
Hard to do them both at the same time.
Well, nobody's perfect.
Only successful marriage I had was me and my work.
I started making money when I was 16...
...and that was that.
Never stopped.
I'll be damned.
I wanted to be a history professor.
Nobody's perfect.
[BOTH CHUCKLING]
I made it through two months of City College...
...before Virginia gave me the news.
And then, you know...
...young, black, broke, baby on the way...
Take the first decent job that comes along.
I always meant to go back...
...but 45 years goes by pretty fast.
Like smoke through a keyhole.
EDWARD: Shit!
[CARTER MO ANING]
Don't give me the morphine while I'm sleeping. It's a waste.
Maybe she's trying to kill us both. You ever think of that?
Gin.
What are you, the devil?
What if I lost my mind already?
Jesus, no.
No. No, no Jesus, this is not praying.
I'm talking to myself out loud, that's...
EDWARD: You ever think about suicide?
CARTER: Suicide? Me? EDWARD: Yeah.
Lord, no.
Thought so. Stage one.
What?
The five stages, but...
Denial.
Then anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance.
So of course you're not thinking of suicide.
You're in stage one. Denial.
What stage are you in?
Denial.
And thinking about suicide.
Yeah, okay. It's just a frame of...
Well, it looks like you won't be needing this anymore.
- That'sit? - Yep,fourth and final.
What's next?
They have to run all the tests first, see where we stand.
- Well, howlong? - Takesa while.
I'll get Dr. Gibian to schedule them when I see him.
Thanks.
I'm on for another hour, anything you need?
Clean bill of health if you got one.
Hang in there, Carter.
That's what I do.
ANNOUNCER [ON TV]: And line to center, base hit...
...Kent will have to play it on three bounces...
...and Alou will score. The throw goes to the back...
Hit the cutoff man, for crying out loud.
You see...
...that's the problem with the game today:
No fundamentals.
Did you ever read The Time of Your Life?
- WilliamSaroyan. -Yeah.
"No foundation. All the way down the line."
When we were growing up... What are you doing?
Nothing, scribbling.
Scribbling? What?
Nothing. Just scribbling.
Oh, sure, that's what you wanna do...
...bounce a slider with a man on third.
These kids today, they...
Earphones. I'm talking to myself, again.
- Edward?- Doc.
How's it going there?
Dumb question.
I got the test back.
I'll just lay it out, huh?
Six months.
A year if we're lucky.
There is an experimental program that we've beenconducting...
...and I don't wanna get your hopes up...
...but I think you would be an excellent candidate...
Hey, doc.
Yes?
You're blocking my view.
Oh.
Sorry.
Anyway, if there's any questions...
...day or night, you know where to find me.
One question.
Sure, of course.
Carter, you wanna ask Dr. Hollins something?
I mean, I'm not familiar with Mr. Chambers'...
Well, get familiar.
Uh...
I just wanted to know how I stand, that's all.
Sure. How about I'll go take a look at your chart, okay?
Thank you.
Edward?
Edward?
CARTER: There was a survey once.
A thousand people were asked, if they could know inadvance...
...would they want to know the exact day of their death.
Ninety-six percent of them said no.
I always kind of leaned toward the other 4 percent.
I thought it would be liberating...
...knowing how much time you had left to work with.
HOLLINS: A year at best.
CARTER: It turns out, it's not.
HOLLINS: We're pretty much out of options.
You want to play cards?
Thought you'd never ask.
THOMAS: Rise and shine.
Or that.
Let me see that.
And, uh, Thomas...
...call Marie at Christie's.
Tell her I won't be bidding this season.
I understand.
Uh, sir, I don't mean to sound indelicate...
...but how do you want me to handle your?
Death?
Treat it as if it were your own.
So leave all the money to my assistant?
Go get me one of those almond croissants that I like.
And don't buy any green bananas.
- What are youdoing? - Whatis this?
- Come on, give itback. - Whatis it?
Give it back.
It was on the floor. I didn't know it was a state secret.
Well, my freshman philosophy professor...
...assigned this exercise in forward thinking.
He called it a "Bucket List."
We were supposed to make a list of things we wanted to do in ourlives...
...beforewe... -Kicked the bucket.
Cutesy.
Anyway, I wrote things like "make a million dollars"...
..."first black president," you know, young man's wishes.
I was gonna redo the list, but then...
"Help a complete stranger for the good."
"Laugh until I cry."
Not to be judgmental, but this is extremely weak.
Well, it's pointless now.
I would argue the exact opposite.
All right. That's it.
What are you doing?
A little rewrite, that's all.
I mean, don't you want to go out with some balls? Gunsblazing?
Have a little fun?
It was not supposed to be about guns blazing or anything likethat.
You're missing the point.
What the hell is "witness something majestic"?
Have you ever been to the Himalayas?
Eh.
"Drive a Mustang Shelby." Not bad.
I got one. All right. How about skydiving?
Now we're onto something.
We're onto something?
- Uh-huh.- Let me see that. Come on.
Fine.
[LAUGHING]
[LAUGHS MOCKINGLY]
"Kiss the most beautiful girl in the world"?
How do you propose doing that?
Volume.
"Get a tattoo." Is that the sum of your ambition?
Edward, I've taken baths deeper than you.
It's easy to be deep in freshman philosophy.
What's Dr. Hollins say?
We got months, right?
A year, maybe.
You think 45 years went by fast?
We could do this.
We should do this.
No, I couldn't.
Don't think about money. That's all I got is money.
But I don't know. L...
What don't you know?
It was meant to be metaphorical.
- I'm just trying to get a handleon... - Blah,blah, blah.
Metaphors.
You're the one crying you never took a shot. Here's yourchance.
My chance to what? Make a fool of myself?
Never too late.
What do you think happens now?
I go back and sit around listening to people...
...talking about mezzanine financing and subordinateddebt...
...pretending that I care about dead money.
You go home to some ceremonial procession into death...
...with everyone standing around watching you die...
...while you try to comfort them.
Is that what you want, to be smothered by pity and grief?
Well, not me.
And in your heart, Carter, I believe not you either.
We're both in the same boat. How's that for a metaphor?
We got a real opportunity here.
Opportunity?
That is real twisted, even by your standards.
We still feel good, right? Energy's coming back a littlebit.
Asymptomatic, the doc says.
The way I see it, we can lay around here...
...hoping for a miracle in some bullshit scienceexperiment...
...or we can put some moves on.
Skydiving, huh?
All right.
[EDWARD LAUGHING THEN DOOR OPENS]
What kind of hospital is this? There isn't an M.D. Within amile.
Virginia, we have to talk.
What did they say?
Uh, Mrs. Chambers, I'm gonna give you two a little quiettime.
Excuse me.
It's not good.
I knew we should have gone to UCLA.
The surgeons are better. Post-op is better.
- Wouldn't havemattered. -You don't know that.
We're not giving up. I want another opinion.
Ah, Virginia.
Yes, Oncology, please. Dr. Veteri's office.
Virginia, no.
Let me handle this.
Dr. Veteri? Virginia Chambers.
Yes, that's right...
I'm going away for a while.
What are you talking about?
I'm talking about Edward and I are going away.
Edward and you?
Going away where?
I don't expect you to understand.
You're damn right I don't understand.
I don't understand how you can just give up like this.
How you can just quit... Quit fighting.
-Virginia. -Why don't you tell our children that?
See what they say when they find out you've given up onthem.
Given up on them?
Given up on them?
I've got 45 years greased up under the hood of a car...
...so that they didn't want for anything, and they didn't.
I think I've earned some time for myself.
To do what? Run off with a total stranger?
He's not a stranger.
I'm your wife.
And I'm your husband. And I'm their father.
And I'm a grandfather. And I'm a damn mechanic!
And you're a fool.
You're a fool who thinks he's figured out a way how not to havecancer.
I'm sorry.
My husband is not for sale.
She hates me.
Do you hate me?
Not yet.
CARTER: And so it began.
I've always been afraid to go up in an airplane...
...now I'm gonna jump out of one at the whim of a maniac!
Wanna get it?
How do you suggest we do that?
Wait.
Ow!
Aah!
Damn it.
Not a word.
Back to the seat, Kyle.
You'll have to forgive him, Kyle. He's worried about the littlewoman.
This has nothing to do with my wife.
Thirty seconds to drop.
The Sequel was like that.
She never backed me up on anything.
The Sequel?
The second Mrs. Edward Cole.
God, that woman hated me.
Maybe because you called her The Sequel.
Jeez, Kyle, I never looked at it that way.
- Fifteen seconds. CARTER: No, no.
- Wait! Wait, I can't dothis. - Sureyou can.
CARTER: No. I can't. Really.
It's not the jump you're afraid of.
The hell it's not!
You're just afraid your chute won't open...
...and you'll show up at your own funeral as a Denveromelet.
No, I'm pretty much just worried the chute won't open.
No, no!
[CARTER SCREAMING]
Man's got some lungs, huh?
Let's hit the silk!
Geronimo!
Oh, yeah, beautiful!
[EDWARD LAUGHING]
CARTER: Aah! Aah!
Pull the thing! Pull the cord!
How about this, huh? This is living.
I hate your rotten guts.
Surrender to the void!
Which one of these damn cords do you pull?
KYLE: Don't touch it. We're not in the drop zone yet. We couldwind up in the...
[KYLE AND CARTER YELL]
INSTRUCTOR: Okay. Let's deploy.
[SINGING] I got a feeling I'm falling
INSTRUCTOR: We're in the red zone. Pull the cord.
[SINGING] I got a feeling I'm falling in love
Pull the damn cord!
I was in love once.
EDWARD: Tommy, we live to die another day.
How lucky for me.
No jokes, Thomas, remember the will. You're so close.
[EDWARD LAUGHS]
Let me ask you something.
Uh, is it Tommy or Thomas?
Um, it's actually Matthew, but he finds that too biblical.
EDWARD: Let's eat something. Come on!
Is he insane?
Depends.
[EDWARD GASPS]
So you decided?
No, I couldn't think of anything I wanted to be stuck withpermanently.
What's permanently? We're gonna be dead in five minutes.
- What? -Figure of speech.
So no Confederate flag, no black Jesus.
No, I'm gonna...
Pass. Yeah, sure.
Well, I never agreed to desecrate my body.
You worried they won't bury you in a Jewish cemetery?
What, the wife?
It's a tattoo.
It's not like you're dumping her for another woman.
I never been with another woman.
Whoa.
That's gotta be on the list.
No, no. I don't think so.
EDWARD: Sixty-six years?
Man, oh, man. We ought to have a big orgy.
No.
Orgy's not even being unfaithful.
No.
It's just, like, professional.
No!
I don't even have to be there.
[LAUGHS]
CARTER: Hello, darling.
- You gonna drive it or buy it adress? - Ha,ha.
Just getting to know each other.
You sure we're cleared for this?
Of course we're cleared for it. What if we weren't?
Just checking.
Come on! Tap it, baby! Let's see what she's got.
Ah, we're doing just fine.
You sound like some kid going to the junior prom.
You sound like someone looking for an ass-whupping.
Ass-whupping? Ho-ho-ho-ho.
- You gotnothing! -Ha, ha.
Got enough for you, Sunny Jim, dangling.
Did you just make a penis reference?
What if I did?
Jesus! You're gonna kill us both!
What if I do?
Goddamn it!
[LAUGHING]
You're breaking evil on me.
Evil? I'll show you evil.
I'll show you Evel goddamn Knievel.
Pick up on this, chicken man!
Yee-ha!
[LAUGHING]
Chicken man, huh?
You can run, but you cannot hide!
[ENGINE SPUTTERING]
What do you wanna do next?
[CARTER LAUGHING]
CARTER: How much money do you have anyway?
EDWARD: Didn't anyone ever tell you...
...that it's rude to talk about someone else's money?
CARTER: I never knew anyone with enough to ask.
Medicinal.
It's indescribably beautiful.
I love flying over the polar cap.
Above the desolation.
The stars...
...it's really one of God's good ones.
So you think a being of some sort did all this?
You don't?
You mean, do I believe if I look up in the sky...
...and promise this or that...
...the Biggie will make all this go away?
No.
Then 95 percent of the people on Earth are wrong?
If life has taught me anything...
...it's that 95 percent of the people are always wrong.
It's called faith.
I honestly envy people who have faith. I just can't get my headaround it.
Maybe your head's in the way.
Carter, we've all had hundreds of these discussions...
...and every one of them always hits the same wall.
Is there a sugarplum fairy or not?
And nobody has ever gotten over that wall.
So, what do you believe?
I resist all beliefs.
No big bang? Random universe?
We live.
We die.
And the wheels on the bus go round and round.
What if you're wrong?
I'd love to be wrong.
If I'm wrong, I win.
I'm not sure it works that way.
Well, you're not claiming you know something I don't.
Mm-mm.
I just have faith.
Hallelujah, brother...
...and pass the mustard.
[SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
CARTER: Know how they harvest caviar? EDWARD: Hit me.
When a female sturgeon is caught...
...the fisherman has to take great care to see she diespeacefully.
- Mm-hm. -Lf she feels the least bit threatened...
...she secretes a sour chemical that ruins the eggs.
Sounds like my third wife.
[LAUGHING]
Woman thought mayonnaise came from a plant.
I could get used to this.
Also sounds like my third wife.
Thirty years I've been coming here.
First time with a guy.
Well, I'm flattered.
Emily's 10th birthday was the best, though.
Who's Emily?
My little, uh...
Well, she's not so little anymore.
You have a daughter?
- But I thought yousaid... -Yeah, well...
...I didn't know you then.
Make a long story short, uh...
...I don't see her.
CARTER: Hmm.
What are you doing?
It's time.
- No, no, no. Cross thatoff. - Whynot?
- Cross itoff. -Why?
Why?
There is no why.
- What's thematter? -Excuse me.
Where you going?
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
Just like a broad.
[WATER RUNNING]
Look, uh, Carter...
I'm sorry. I know...
...sometimes I get a little overbearing and l...
[SCRUBBING]
Jesus Christ.
- It's all right. It'sokay. - What?What?
The top on the catheter came loose, that's all.
Well, maybe we should get you to a hospital, Carter...
- I just busted out of thehospital. -Huh?
It's all right. Look, it's already stopped, see? Let's get outof here.
It looks wonderful. Uh... Uh...
- Maybe I'll getthe... -Let's just go.
- You go straight to thecar. - Comeon. Come on.
Okay, all right.
- Where's...? Where's Tommy? MAN: In the salon, monsieur.
CARTER: Oh, my.
How much money do you have?
Well, I wouldn't bleed on the rugs.
[CHUCKLES]
I'm gonna find someplace where I can take a nice hot bath.
Be as good as new afterwards.
Uh... You... Okay.
- Tom... -Okay, we're all set, then? Okay, good.
All right, it took some doing, but, uh, I rearrangedeverything.
Cairo tomorrow, Tanzania for two days, then Johannesburg onSaturday.
And, as previously directed, no bullfight, no tiger hunt.
Thomas, I'd really like to say you're irreplaceable...
...but I'd be lying.
And I'd really like to say you're a gracious man, and I love myjob...
...but I, too, would be lying.
Turnabout is fair play.
I believe you learned that from the master.
CARTER: Hey, look! They got Jeopardy! In the bathroom!
On the TV. Jeopardy!
[CELL PHONE RINGING]
Jeopardy!? In French?
Hello?
Mr. Cole? Virginia Chambers.
Oh. Yeah. Um, hi.
Let me get Carter for you.
Well, actually, I called to speak to you.
Oh.
Is he all right?
Oh, yeah. He's... He's fine.
May I ask where you are?
France, actually. Uh, tomorrow...
Give him back to me.
Virginia. May I call you Virginia?
I'm not sure that I can make...
VIRGINIA: I'm not asking for his sake.
Mr. Cole...
...l've been a nurse my entire adult life.
Had a ringside seat to more human tragedy...
...than any woman should ever have to bear.
Now, I'm prepared for my husband to die.
I'm just not prepared to lose him while he's still alive.
- Who is Howdy Doody? PRESENTER [ON TV]: You got it.
- Youpick. - "TvPuppets," for 400.
PRESENTER: These two Muppets...
...are roommates on the long-running show Sesame Street.
- Who are Bert and Ernie? MAN: Who are Bert and Ernie?
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
[SPEAKS IN FRENCH]
PRESENTER:- The son of a Greek immigrant...
...was born in Towson, Maryland.
Who is Spiro Agnew?
WOMAN: Who is Spiro Agnew?
Well...
...you're looking, uh...
...buoyant.
This is the first time I was ever in a tub with no corners.
Really?
You know, ahem, Carter, uh, I've been thinking...
...what with the catheter and everything...
...maybe we should put this on hold for a while.
Come on, now, I told you, stop worrying. I'm fine.
No, no, it's not that. It's not that.
It's just, I mean, if you're worried about letting medown...
...you know, it's a lot easier for me.
You talked to Virginia, didn't you?
[SIGHS]
Why do you think I'm doing this?
Because I talked you into it.
Edward, you're strong, but you're not that strong.
No.
After Rachel left for college, there was a hole.
I mean, you know, no more homework, no more Little League...
...recitals, school plays...
...kids crying, fights, skinned knees.
And for the first time in 40 years, I looked at Virginia...
...without all of the noise, without all of thedistractions...
...and I couldn't remember what it felt like...
...when I could not walk down the street without holding herhand.
I mean, she was the same woman I fell in love with, she hadn'tchanged.
But somehow everything was different.
We'd lost something along the way.
You know?
WOMAN: "Tv Puppets," for 600.
PRESENTER: Ventriloquist Edgar Bergen hosted a show named forthis dummy.
Who is Charlie McCarthy?
PRESENTER: Sandy? SAND Y: Who's Charlie McCarthy?
[CARTER SINGING "THE LION SLEEPS TONIGHT"]
[BOTH SINGING]
Look, look, look!
Aah!
CARTER: I was very pleased when Edward decided...
...to eliminate item number nine from his list:
"Hunt the big cat."
Of course, he did insist on discharging a few rounds from thebig gun.
[GUNSHOT]
[EDWARD GRUNTS]
CARTER: One proved to be enough.
- Gin. -Of course, gin, why not?
CARTER: Do you know...
...that the only dog ever struck by lightning was right here, inEgypt?
I wish I'd met you before we were dead.
[CARTER LAUGHING]
You know, technically...
...we could cross off two items:
"See the pyramids"...
...and "witness something majestic."
This is about as majestic as it gets.
Wait till you see my mountain.
Oh, yeah.
Your mountain.
Still, this ain't half bad.
You know, the ancient Egyptians had a beautiful belief aboutdeath.
When their souls got to the entrance to heaven...
...the gods asked them two questions.
Their answers determined whether they were admitted or not.
Okay, I'll bite.
What were they?
Have you found joy in your life?
Uh-huh.
Answer the question.
- Me? -Yeah, you.
Answer the question, "Have I found joy in my life?"
Yes.
Has your life brought joy to others?
Ah, this type of question, l...
I don't know, uh...
I don't think about how other people gauge, uh...
Ask them.
I'm asking you.
Fine.
Fine.
Let me put it to you this way.
After the breakup, and the ensuing fleecing of the dad...
...Emily went to live with her mother.
You know, you try to stay close, but it gets down toholidays...
...phone calls, birthday cards, you know.
Anyway...
...Emily goes to college, joins one of her "Save the PoorPeople"...
...the animals, whatnot...
...meets a guy, decides she loves him.
Good-looking kid, driven, smart.
But there was something about him...
...so when she said they were engaged I told her I was againstit...
...but being my daughter, naturally...
...she went ahead and married him anyway.
Needless to say, I wasn't invited to the wedding.
That must have hurt.
You think?
First time he hit her, she came to me. I wanted to bash hisbrains in.
She wouldn't let me.
Said she loved him, said it wasn't his fault, he'd had a fewdrinks...
...she was the one picked the fight.
Next time it happened, she didn't come to me.
The ex told me. Nice to hear her voice again.
What did you do?
What any father would do.
I took care of it.
I called a guy who called a guy who handles these kinds ofthings.
I don't know what he said, don't know what he did...
...all I know is he didn't kill him...
...and my daughter never heard from him again.
How did she react?
Called me names you wouldn't believe, and worse...
Said I was dead to her.
I'm not proud of everything I did...
...but I'm pretty sure I'd do it all again...
...so if they don't let me into Egyptian heaven because mydaughter hates me...
...well, then I guess that's just the way it goes.
However you answer your two questions.
How do we get down from this tomb?
CARTER: The empress was the wife of Shah Jahan, the fifth Mogulemperor.
Although it was an arranged marriage, they were deeply inlove...
...and remained inseparable until she died giving birth to their14th child.
Do you mind if I call you Ray?
Main man Ray.
Are you listening to anything I'm saying?
Absolutely.
Fourteen kids. I'm with you.
It took 20,000 volunteers 22 years to complete thisstructure.
Every square foot designed by the shah himself.
So that's true love.
That's true love.
Must be nice.
Don't know if I buy the whole "20,000 volunteers" business.
EDWARD: Funeral plans tend to confuse me.
Specifically, buried or cremated.
Take buried.
Now, I know it shouldn't matter, but I'm claustrophobic.
[CARTER CHUCKLES]
What if I wake up underground and nobody can hear me?
Do they still make those coffins with the bells?
Uh... I don't believe they do.
Then cremated. What do you do with the ashes?
Do you bury them, scatter them, put them on a shelf?
Float them down the Ganges on a bed of flowers?
What if I feel the flames?
Well, I definitely want to have myself cremated.
Maybe we should go frozen like Walt Disney.
No. Cremated.
Ashes put in a can, buried some place with a view.
A can, huh?
Yeah. I never liked the sound of the word urn.
Really? Got any special feelings about crypt?
Heh. No.
No, an old Chock Full o'Nuts can will do me just fine.
Chock Full o'Nuts, "the Heavenly Coffee."
Better coffee even your money can't buy, my friend.
Don't bet on it.
Oh, right.
Kopi Luwak.
What do you got against Kopi Luwak?
Too fancy for my tastes.
Oh, yeah. Too fancy for my main man, Ray.
[LAUGHING]
CARTER:Gin. -Goddamn it.
You get all the cards.
EDWARD: This is China for you, baby.
Whoo-hoo! Yeah!
Be a lot more majestic if we could see it.
See that old woman?
Odds are we're gonna be dead before her.
Happy thought.
Of course, she's probably got reincarnation going for her...
...however that system works.
Ah, the Buddhists believe you keep coming back.
Moving up or down a level, based on how you lived your life.
See, that's where they lose me.
I mean, what would a snail have to do to move up in thelineup?
Lay down a perfect trail of slime?
So shitty news, or really shitty news?
A, the first one.
There's a storm up there.
Well, thanks for the bulletin, Tom, we can't even see thegoddamn thing.
They won't let us fly up until the weather clears.
Well, when do they expect it to clear?
Uh, next spring, sometime.
That's the really shitty news, in case you were wondering.
[CARTER SIGHS]
Well, maybe next time.
Yeah.
Next spring.
So now what?
Well, maybe your mountain's trying to tell us something.
What do you mean?
Maybe we've been gone long enough.
Gone long enough? Gone long enough for whom?
Oh. No, I get it.
The mountain isn't telling us it's time for us to go home.
The mountain is telling you to tell me it's time for me to gohome, right?
- Yeah. -You shit.
Why don't you worry about your life, and let me worry aboutmine, okay?
Okay, okay! You don't have to get chippy with me.
CARTER: What's next? EDWARD: Next, Hong Kong.
EDWARD: Silk suits and black walnut ice cream.
Tibetans call it Chomulungma, "Goddess Mother of the Snows."
"Goddess Mother of the World," actually.
In the traditional Tibetan translation.
I stand corrected.
Pinot Noir, please.
I take it you've been there?
Uh... Uh... Um... I just left, actually.
We tried to go up, but it wasn't...
You're a little late in the season.
So they tell me.
- My name'sAngelica. -Yeah, Carter.
I'm sorry if this sounds terrible...
...but aren't you a little developed in years to be running up agiant mountain?
"Developed," now that's certainly one way of putting it.
Well, I've been up there, you know.
- Really?- Mm-hm.
I made it to 26,000 feet before we had to turn back.
- Really?- Mm-hm.
What was it like?
Cold...
- Mm. ...mostly.
During the day, the sky is more black than blue.
There's not enough air to reflect the sunlight.
But at night, you've never seen so many stars.
Seems like they're just out of reach, and so bright.
They're like little holes in the floor of heaven.
- Did you hearit? - Hearwhat?
I read an account of a man who made it to the summit...
...and standing there at the top of the world...
...he experienced this profound silence.
It was like all sound just fell away.
And that's when he heard it.
What?
The sound of the mountain.
He said it was like he heard the voice of God.
I've never done this before.
That sounds like such a cliche...
...but I have a room upstairs.
Well, that's...
I mean...
I...
I appreciate that.
But you see...
She's a very lucky woman.
Well, I rather think I'm the lucky one.
Good for you.
Tom?
Three things to remember when you get older:
Never pass up a bathroom...
...never waste a hard-on, and never trust a fart.
I'll keep that in mind as I approach decrepitude.
Heh-heh. That's a good one there.
Let's go home.
Excuse me?
I want to go home now.
But I thought that... What about the silk suits?
That was very clever of you, Edward.
[LAUGHS]
How'd you know I wouldn't go through with it?
I didn't.
I'm proud of you.
Nobody cares what you think.
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
America.
Hey, Tommy, this isn't the way to Crenshaw.
There's an accident on the 10. We're taking the surfacestreets.
Uh-huh.
Why are we, uh?
Oh, my God.
He's kept tabs on her. Just in case you decided to...
This was your idea, Tom?
No, it was my idea. I talked him into it.
- Yeah, talked him intoit. -Hey.
Wait a minute. Edward. Edward? Wait a minute.
Edward. What are you so afraid of?
Just because I told you my story does not invite you to be apart of it.
Oh. Like the lady in the bar?
- That'sdifferent. -Tell me how.
- Because itis! - How isit different?
You have no fucking idea who I am!
I built a billion-dollar business up from nothing!
Presidents have asked my advice.
I have dined with royalty and I'm supposed to make out like,what...
...this trip was supposed to mean something to me?
Like it was gonna change me?
How did you see it playing out, Carter? I knock on the door, sheanswers.
She's surprised and angry...
...but I tell her how much I love her and miss her.
And, "Oh. By the way, I'm gonna be dead soon...
...so I'm reaching out to you because I don't wanna diealone"?
Everyone is afraid to die alone.
I'm not everyone!
This was supposed to be fun.
That's all it ever was.
No, you don't get in. Call a cab.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
VIRGINIA: Dear Heavenly Father, we just want to thank you forthis day...
...for having our family here together, once again.
And, Lord, we just want to thank you for returning myhusband...
...their father, Lord, to us.
[CHATTERING]
[VIRGINIA LAUGHS]
[SNIFFS]
WOMAN 1: Is he crying?
WOMAN 2: I don't know.
He's usually so much fun.
[CRYING]
[LAUGHING]
VIRGINIA: Oh...
- Wait aminute. -What?
- I got something forus. - Oh?
I wasn't sure I'd need it.
CARTER: Sure.
VIRGINIA: Ow! CARTER: Heh.
Okay.
[CLEARS THRO AT]
VIRGINIA: You know how long it's been?
Do I wanna know?
[VIRGINIA LAUGHING]
VIRGINIA: Well, it's been longer than that.
[CHUCKLES]
You know, I feel like a teenager. Like our first time.
Uh, if we were teenagers, we never would've gotten out of thatliving room.
I remember the first time.
There was no tiptoeing around.
You were on me like... that.
Carter?
Oh, you playing hide-and-seek now, huh? Okay.
Carter!
- Which resulted in a 15 percent increase in cash assets...
...following the sale of the recovery center to PhillipsMedical.
Mr. Cole?
Mr. Cole?
You ever read The Divine Comedy?
Excuse me, sir?
The Divine Comedy, Dante Alighieri's journey into hell.
Maybe we should take a break.
We don't need a break.
I'm in remission. I'm a goddamn medical miracle.
I'm simply asking...
...if you ever read The Divine Comedy.
Sir, you have a phone call.
Tommy, not now.
I really think you should take this.
[CHATTERING]
Uh...
Hey, Edward.
What's the prognosis?
It's metastasized to his brain.
Metast... Operable?
The odds aren't what we'd like them to be.
Odds.
Jesus.
How's he doing?
He's doing okay.
Uh, he wanted me to give you this.
I was supposed to wait until after...
...but then I thought...
She never listened to me before.
Why change a winning formula?
[CHUCKLES]
You look like shit, Ray.
Thanks.
How they treating you?
Pea soup still sucks.
I'll have a word with the owner.
You do that.
Can I have some water?
You can't have water, but I'll get you some of those lemonswabs, okay?
CARTER: All right.
You still drinking that fancy coffee?
What?
What are you, obsessed?
[CARTER CHUCKLES]
Read it.
"Kopi Luwak is the world's most expensive coffee.
Though for some, it falls under the category of 'too good to betrue.'
In the Sumatran village where the beans are grown...
...lives a breed of wild tree cat.
These cats eat the beans, digest them and then...
...defecate.
The villagers then collect and process the stools.
It is the combination of the beans and the gastric juices of thetree cat...
...that give Kopi Luwak its unique flavor...
...and aroma."
You're shitting me.
Cats beat me to it.
- You got a pen? Give me apen. -What?
What?
Here.
It's not finished.
Well...
It's not a one-man deal.
I'm afraid it'll have to be.
We're ready.
I'll be here when you get back.
Sounds good to me.
CARTER: Dear Edward, I've gone back and forth the last fewdays...
...trying to decide whether or not I should even write this.
In the end, I realized I would regret it if I didn't...
...so here goes.
I know the last time we saw each other...
...we weren't exactly hitting the sweetest notes.
It certainly wasn't the way I wanted the trip to end.
I suppose I'm responsible, and for that I'm sorry.
But, in all honesty, if I had the chance, I'd do it again.
Virginia said I left a stranger and came back a husband.
I owe that to you.
There's no way I can repay you for all you've done for me...
...so rather than try, I'm just going to ask you to do somethingelse for me.
Find the joy in your life.
You once said you're not everyone.
Well, that's true.
You're certainly not everyone.
But everyone is everyone.
My pastor always says:
"Our lives are streams...
...flowing into the same river...
...towards whatever heaven lies in the mist beyond thefalls."
Hello, sweetie. Hi.
CARTER: Find the joy in your life, Edward.
My dear friend...
...close your eyes and let the waters take you home.
Good afternoon. My name is Edward Cole.
I don't know what most people say at these occasions,because...
...in all honesty, I...
I've tried to avoid them.
The simplest thing is...
...I loved him and I miss him.
Carter and I saw the world together.
Which is amazing...
...when you think that only three months ago...
...we were complete strangers.
I hope...
...that it doesn't sound selfish of me...
...but the last months of his life...
...were the best months of mine.
He saved my life.
And he knew it before I did.
EDWARD: I'm deeply proud that this man...
...found it worth his while to know me.
In the end...
...I think it's safe to say that we brought some joy to oneanother's lives.
So, one day, when...
...I go to some final resting place...
...if I happen to wake up next to a certain wall with agate...
...I hope that Carter's there...
...to vouch for me...
...and show me the ropes on the other side.
CARTER: Edward Perriman Cole died in May.
It was a Sunday, in the afternoon...
...and there wasn't a cloud in the sky.
He was 81 years old.
Even now, I can't claim to understand the measure of a life.
But I can tell you this:
I know that when he died, his eyes were closed...
...and his heart was open.
And I'm pretty sure he was happy with his final restingplace...
...because he was buried on the mountain...
...and that was against thelaw.
爱德华·佩里曼·科尔在五月离世
那是一个周日的下午，晴空万里无云
人生的意义是什么，答案众说纷纭
有人说要看他留下了什么
有人认为要看他的信仰
有人说要用爱来评判
还有人说人生根本就毫无意义
我？
我觉得可以从那些以你为镜的人身上
看到你自己人生的意义
我能肯定的是，不管按什么标准
爱德华·科尔在人世间的最后时光
比大部分人毕生的光阴更为充实
我知道，他在离世的时候合上了双眼
却敞开了心灵
说出5个姓氏以H开头的总统的名字
H？
沃伦·G·哈丁卢瑟福·B·海斯，赫伯特·胡佛
还有两个姓哈里逊的本杰明和威廉·亨利
啊
我还以为那两个哈里逊能难住你呢
你真变态，知道吗？
这就叫变态了？你知道他们老婆的名字吗？
-不知道- 我也不知道
-喂，老卡！- 啊？
-那辆雪佛兰，他们什么时候要？- 昨天
啊？
-有了，我再问一个- 说吧
谁发明了无线电报？
这问题挺难答的
-不容易，终于考住你了- 不是
我不知道你问的是自称发明了无线电报的那个人呢
还是真正发明了无线电报的那个人
这个，这里说的是…
马可尼，对吗？
是啊，难道不是他吗？
一般都认为是他发明的
而且，他也因此在1909年获得诺贝尔奖
但事实上是一个名叫尼可拉·特斯拉的人
在1896年就无线电报的基本构想注册了专利
几年后马可尼在自己的专利里使用了相同的构想
特斯拉直到1943年他死的那天都在为这事跟马可尼争
同年最高法院裁定
马可尼的专利无效
认定特斯拉为无线电报的发明者
我是卡特
你实在太变态了
哦，嗨，吉妮
哦，太好了，终于出来了结果怎么说？
好吧，那是什么意思？
鲁瓦克咖啡，世间最珍罕的饮品
闻闻看
来啊
科尔先生，董事会已准备好听您的提案了
等一下
来吧，尝尝
怎么样？
很好
很好
科尔先生？
你知道何谓凡夫俗子吗，吉姆？
先生，我叫理查德
没错，小凡，上去侃晕他们
谢谢各位主席先生，各位主管：
我们科尔集团感到温伍德医院的衰败
是由于财务管理不善造成的
-营业间接成本几乎翻了一倍- 请原谅，我们医院…
租金及置业费用也高于正常水准
不管是在科研、儿科、肿瘤科还是核磁共振部门
所获赠的捐款跌至历史最低点
科尔集团在7年内先后完成了15所公立医院的私有化改造
改造后的每一所医院有些已经运转，其他的即将启动
都致力于为所在社区提供最好的医疗服务
-那些医院人手不足，你怎么不提？- 提高医生的素质，就能……
那床位呢？有传言说…
你们接收病人过多，导致医院人满为患
病人的数量一直是…
还有急诊室，大家都知道那是…
我开的是医院，不是温泉疗养院
一房两床，无一例外
为了来这儿，我放弃了和米歇儿·菲佛共进午餐的机会
能不能别搞这种形式主义？
姑娘们小子们，你们需要我
我不需要你们
这个信封里有张巨额支票
如果对数额满意，就告诉我一声
科尔先生，你没事吧？
你在这里干嘛？
哦，争取活下去，你呢？
哦，我只是有点惊讶…
我不管什么保险不保险
告诉那个大脑有屎的医生
他让我打的这个博来霉素是什么东西，让他告诉我
我听说那玩意儿会蚕食你的肺
我下个月还要去国会演讲
我可不想靠喉咙上的洞来呼吸
-其实不是那样的- 这家伙是谁？
-汤玛斯在哪里？汤姆！- 就在眼前，先生
-嗨，汤姆- 我们要把你挪到床上去
我自己来，我还没死呢
要帮忙吗？
我最近炒过你鱿鱼吗？
奥普拉事件那次之后就没再炒过了
-那次很有意思- 是啊，是很有意思
那他妈是谁啊？
你他妈是谁啊？
他说，“你他妈…”
哦上帝，我在哪儿啊，停尸房吗？
那是我第一次见到爱德华·科尔
很显然，开头并不吉利
饶了我吧，亲爱的上帝
我讨厌这些…这些个破管子！
如果让我在这家伙身边躺三个星期，我会死的
那人呆头呆脑的，半截都已经埋土里了
你不能住单间，否则舆论会饶不了你
我才不管什么狗屁舆论
我要住单间，这是我的医院，没天理啊
别跟我说我不能住单间
不是针对你的，伙计
可你在公开场合始终推行这句口号
你开的是医院，不是温泉疗养院一房两床，无一例外
我这不是自己没生过病吗
好了，艾尔德里奇医生马上就来给您标注手术点了
标注手术点…
上帝啊
汤玛斯…
千万别让我一醒来成了个瘫子
我会尽力的
这儿真是你的医院？
是，基本上是
你也许该过问一下这儿的豌豆汤
手术当天早上发现
癌细胞已经扩散到爱德华的全身
医生估计他撑过手术期的可能只有5%
令他们始料未及的是爆脾气让他走得更远
没有人来看他吗？
他从手术室出来就一直在睡
我之所以天天来照看你这也是其中的一个原因
要是像他那样，做了那么大的手术
还孤零零的一个人，真是太可怜了
至少他不多嘴
瑞秋今天早上打电话来
真的？她怎么样？
她想成为下学期乐队的首席小提琴手正在接受试演
太棒了
还要书吗？
不用了，我很好
晚上的药吃了吗？
已经吃了
枕头呢？
我很好，维吉尼亚，真的，谢谢你
如果你需要，我可以再多陪你一会
我们两个都早点休息吧，好吗？
好吧
她走了？
什么？
作为一名公众健康专家
我认为被探望者烦死的人
远比病死的多
我选“浆果”，600分
这种浆果产于瑞典，又名牛浆果
-是越橘- 是越橘
-答对了！- 我选“浆果”，800分
他姓“浆果”，在1956年的一首40大金曲里，他说要超越贝多芬
是恰克·贝瑞
-是恰克·贝瑞- 答对了
嘿
老兄
能不能？
哦，对不起
-是马里亚那海沟- 是马里亚那海沟
早上好，爱德华
-早- 感觉怎么样啊？
什么白痴问题
那根导尿管难受不？
真不知道我以前没插管是怎么尿的
会开玩笑了，好兆头
吃屎去吧
会骂粗话也是好兆头这可是你的最爱，对不对？
-是啊- 让我看看这里怎么样
看起来不错
好了，手术很成功
术后脑部检查也没什么问题
接下来就该解决其他部位的癌细胞了
但不幸的是，你的血液指标极度偏高
所以今天早上就得开始第一轮化疗
早晨的化疗多么芬芳
《现代启示录》，对吗？
让我感觉像个胜利者！
-我过会再来看你- 好的
医生？医生？
请问您能不能看一下…
-对不起，我赶时间，你的医生是谁？- 吉比安医生
我会告诉护士的
谢谢
真操蛋，不是吗？
-是夸克- 是夸克
你在这里待多久了？
进进出出的好几个月了现在让我接受一种试验疗法
-是二次方程- 是二次方程
有多难受？
化疗？
不算太糟
只要你不介意一天到晚吐个不停…
眼睁睁看着血管变黑…
感觉骨头越来越软…
剩下的感受么，跟在海边日光浴差不多
那我就放心了
当然了，我听说各人的反应不一样
你今晚上就知道了
今晚？
听着…
我想问一下
那边那个精致的装置是干嘛的？
是虹吸壶，煮咖啡的
它还能干嘛？
它还需要干嘛？
知道吗，埃塞俄比亚的羊倌最先发现了咖啡
-不可能- 是真的
据说是他的山羊吃了一种陌生灌木的浆果
没多久，那群羊就乱蹦乱跳…
兴奋得不得了
于是羊倌带上几枝浆果去了当地修道院
那里的修道士决定把浆果烤一下
烤着烤着…
浆果里的豆子散发出一股浓郁的香气
然后他们把豆子放入炖锅里煮
炖锅？
随后几百年里，咖啡传到了阿拉伯和欧洲
甚至苏门答腊，你那袋东西就产自那里
那叫做鲁瓦克咖啡
我知道这个牌子
你知道？
我可从来没喝过那玩意儿
你试过吗？
没有，我更喜欢速溶咖啡
来，我来帮你
-谢谢- 别客气
给你
你脸上的斑，一直有的吗？
打记事起就有了
很有意思的…
斑点
好了，这里有意大利熏火腿甜瓜、还有一些布拉塔干酪
和一片香烤小牛排
来自托斯卡纳的极品美食
你要把那些全吃了？
我是这么打算的
怎么了？
你想让汤玛斯给你也弄一盘吗？
汤米，整一盘给这位…
卡特
名还是姓？
名
真的？有意思
你要不要来点儿？美食能振奋精神
不用了，谢谢好意
你确定？
好吃，好吃
美味冠绝洛杉矶
美味灌进马桶里…
哦，老天
玛雅又获奖了
我就知道她行的
我的上帝
那些死于心脏病的家伙运气真好啊
你们好
科尔先生
不要管我，我只是在自言自语
这是小凯给你的
他说长大了想跟爷爷一样当机械师
我建议你让他打消这个念头
我试过了
这是什么？
是辆福特野马350
-我一直想要一辆来着- 是啊
小凯记得的
妈妈觉得你休息得不够
爸，她很爱你
好了
检查结果一出来就通知我们好吗？
等出来再说吧
好的
-保重- 好的
他是老大？
是啊
他干什么的？
-罗杰是个税务律师- 哦
你看
他弟弟，李，是个工程师
那个漂亮的小姑娘是谁？
那是瑞秋，三兄妹里的老幺
跟她哥哥的年纪差好多
这个，她是意外之喜
自打她出世，她的哥哥们都不愿出屋了
她是个出色的小提琴手
你有孩子吗？
得看情况
我从没有过很长的一段婚姻
别担心，我结婚的时间够我们俩分的
感觉如何？
就这么着
不错啊
所以他们才发明了电灯开关嘛
别误会了，我爱结婚，都结过四次了
问题在于，我也爱单身生活
鱼和熊掌不可兼得啊
人无完人嘛
我唯一成功的婚姻就是和事业的结合
我16岁起开始赚钱
之后就…
一发不可收拾
我比较倒霉
我原本想当一名历史系教授
人无完人
我在市立学院学了两个月之后
维吉尼亚说她有喜了
于是，你知道…
我一个黑人，年纪轻轻一贫如洗还拖家带口
能有份待遇不错的工作还不赶紧接了？
我一直想回去
但45年一晃就过去了
如白驹过隙
不行了！
我睡着了还给我打吗啡，多浪费
也许她是想把我们两个都杀了你没想过吗？
碰（一种名叫“金”的牌戏）
你是赌神啊？
如果我已经失去理智了怎么办？
上帝啊，不
不不，对不起上帝，这不是祈祷
我是在自言自语，这是…
你想过自杀吗？
-自杀？我？- 是啊
老天，当然没有啦
我就知道，你这是第一阶段
什么？
有五个阶段…
先是拒绝
然后是愤怒，妥协，沮丧，接受
所以现在你当然不会考虑自杀
因为你还处在第一阶段，拒绝
那你在哪个阶段？
拒绝
那就考虑一下自杀吧
那就考虑一下自杀吧
好吧，这不过是个框框…
看来你不用再打这些吊针了
-打完了？- 对的，第四个疗程，也是最后一个
接下来干嘛？
先做完所有的检查，看结果再定
-要多久- 需要一点时间
我一见到吉比安医生就会让他安排检查的
谢谢了
我还有一个小时才下班，还需要什么吗？
如果有的话，给我张健康证明吧
坚持住啊，卡特
我这不一直坚持着吗？
一个直飞垒间线的安打
肯特必须在球弹地三次之前接球
阿劳要得分了！球被掷回内场…
靠，把那个内野手毙了算了
看见没…
这就是当今棒球运动的问题所在
基本功太差
你看过《鼎盛年华》吗？
-威廉·萨洛扬写的- 没错
“没有基础一切事物赖以存在的基础…”
“当我们长大的时候…”你在干吗？
没什么，随便写写
随便写？写什么？
没什么，就是随便写写
哦，不是吧，怎么能这么打呢？
这种滑球接它干嘛，这下三振出局了
现在的这些孩子…
带上耳机了…我又在自言自语了
-爱德华？- 医生
你怎么样？
白痴问题
我拿到检查结果了
我就跟你直说了，好吗？
还有六个月
运气好的话，还有一年
我们正在搞一个实验疗法
我不想给你一些无谓的希望
但我觉得这疗法很适合你
嘿，医生
嗯？
你挡到我了
哦
抱歉
总之，不管有什么问题
随时都可以找我
有个问题
好的，说吧
卡特，你有什么想问霍林斯医生的？
这个，我不熟悉钱伯斯先生的…
那就熟悉一下
我只想知道我的检查结果如何，就这个
好的，我先去看看你的病历再说好吗？
谢谢你
爱德华？
爱德华？
曾经有这么个调查
有一千个人被问及若有可能事先获悉
想不想知道自己确切的死亡时间
96%的人选择了不想
我总觉得自己属于另外的4%
如果能知道自己的生命还剩多少
我觉得这其实是一种解脱
…最多还有一年…
但事实证明，我不属于那4%
…基本上我们已别无选择…
想玩牌吗？
就怕你不问
太阳晒屁股了
好吧
那个给我看看
还有，汤玛斯…
打电话给克利斯蒂拍卖行的玛丽
这个季度我不会去竞拍了
明白
哦，先生，我也不想惹你不高兴
不过，你想让我怎么料理你的…
后事？
当成你自己的后事去料理就好了
那…把所有的钱都留给助手？
帮我去买个我爱吃的杏仁羊角面包来
别买什么青香蕉
-你在干吗？- 这是什么？
-快还给我- 这是什么？
还给我
我从地上捡的，不知道这是国家机密
我大一的时候，一个哲学教授…
给我们布置了一项人生前景规划的作业
他称之为“遗愿清单”
将此生想做的事情列成一份清单
-在我们…- “猪脚踢悬梁”之前（死的谐称）
真做作
我就写了“赚一百万”啊
“成为首位黑人总统啊”之类的年少轻狂的想法
现在我想重写这份清单，但是…
“出于善意，帮助陌生人”
“笑到流眼泪”
不是我说你，这些也太逊了点
现在也没什么用了
我的看法与你正好相反
嗯，这个可以
你在干嘛？
重写一下而已
难道你不想去逞逞能，放放枪什么的？
给自己找点乐子
放枪之类的事怎么能写进清单？
你根本搞错了
“亲眼目睹神迹”究竟算什么东西？
你去过喜马拉雅山吗？
“开一次野马跑车”，还不错
我想到一个…去跳伞怎么样？
我们现在有事做了
我们有事做了？
-嗯哼- 让我看看，快点
好的
“亲吻世界上最美丽的女孩”？
你打算怎么做？
以量取胜
“刺一个纹身”这就是你的人生目标？
爱德华，我洗个澡都比你这有深度
大一的哲学作业，要深度当然不难
霍林斯医生怎么说来着？
我们只有几个月了，对吗？
说不定有一年
你不是说，45年一晃就没了？
我们能完成这些事
也应该去完成
不，我不能
别为钱犯难，我也只剩下钱了
但我不知道…
你不知道什么？
本来应该是些象征性的事情
-我只是想试着去处理…- 废话，废话，废话
象征性
你说一直没机会尝试这不你的机会来了吗？
什么我的机会？犯傻的机会？
总比没机会犯好
你认为现在该怎么做？
我回去上班，然后傻坐着…
听别人说着融资次贷的事情
假装自己还关心那些该死的钱
你呢回家，沐浴焚香穿好寿衣
任由身边的人围着你，看着你咽气
而你还要安慰他们
那就是你想要的？在同情和悲痛的气氛中慢慢窒息？
我可不愿意
在你的内心深处，相信你也不愿意
我们俩现在是一条线上的蚂蚱这句话的象征性不错吧？
我们现在有个难得的机遇
机遇？
即使按你的标准，这话也比较离谱
我们现在感觉还行，对么？身体恢复了少许活力
医生说了，没什么症状
照我看来，要么我们躺在这里…
静静祈祷那些狗屁实验能出现奇迹
要么我们采取一些行动
跳伞啊？
太好了
这算哪门子医院啊？连个医学博士都没有
维吉尼亚，我们得谈谈
医生怎么说？
钱伯斯夫人，我先出去，你们俩慢慢谈
告退了
情况不好
我就知道该去加州大学附属医院看
那儿的外科医生和术后治疗都比这里强
-也没什么用的- 你又不知道
我们不能放弃，我要想其他办法
维吉尼亚
你好，请转肿瘤科，维特里医生办公室
维吉尼亚，不用
让我来吧
维特里医生？我是维吉尼亚·钱伯斯
是的，没错…
我要离开一段时间
你说什么？
我说，我和爱德华要离开这儿
你和爱德华？
离开去哪儿？
我不指望你能理解
你说对了，我还真不理解
我不明白你怎么就这样放弃了呢
你怎么就这样放弃…放弃努力
-维吉尼亚- 为什么不去跟你的孩子说这些？
要是知道你就这样放弃他们他们会怎么说？
放弃他们？
我放弃了他们？
我在引擎盖下干了45年
为的就是让他们心无旁骛，这点我做到了
我想也该给自己一些时间了
给自己时间去做什么？跟一个陌生人走？
他不是什么陌生人
我是你的妻子
我是你的丈夫，他们的父亲
我还是个祖父，是个他妈的修理工！
你还是个傻子
你是个自欺欺人的傻子
对不起
我的丈夫不卖！
她恨我
你恨我吗？
暂时还不恨
计划开始了
我一直害怕坐飞机
现在我却要为了一个疯子的一时兴起从飞机上跳出去！
要捡回来吗？
你觉得我该怎么捡吧？
等等
该死
闭嘴
回去吧，凯尔
原谅他，凯尔，他在担心家里那口子
这跟我老婆没关系
三十秒后跳伞
我的“续集”也是如此
她从没支持过我干任何事
“续集”？
第二任爱德华·科尔夫人
神啊，那个女人恨我
也许是因为你叫她“续集”
天哪，凯尔，我居然从来没想过这点
-倒数15秒- 不，不
-等等！我不能跳- 你能跳的
不，我真的不能
你不是怕跳出去
当然不是了！
你只是害怕你的降落伞打不开…
到时像摊鸡蛋饼一样出现在自己的葬礼上
不，我只是非常担心而已
不，不！
那家伙嗓门很大啊
我们也跳吧
勇者无敌!
噢耶，漂亮！
快拉啊！快拉绳！
感觉怎么样啊？这才是生活
我恨死你了
尽情享受蓝天吧！
这么一大堆绳子，到底该拉哪根?
别乱动，我们还没到指定区域现在拉伞会让我们…
好了，开伞吧
我有一种坠入深渊的感觉…
我们快到危险区了，拉开伞包
我有一种坠入爱河的感觉…
快他妈拉绳子！
也曾有爱…
（跳伞！）
汤米，人活着就为了在某天死去
我真是运气
不是玩笑话，汤玛斯记得我的遗嘱吧，你很有希望
我想问你点事
你是叫汤米还是汤玛斯？
事实上我叫马修但他觉得那是圣经人物专有的名字
我们去吃点东西吧，快走！
他是不是疯了？
得看情况
你决定好了没有？
没有，我可不想把什么东西永远留在身上
什么永远啊？说不定五分钟后我们就翘了
-什么？- 一种表达方式而已
那么，不纹邦联旗（内战时的南方势力支持农奴制），也不纹黑皮肤的上帝
不，我还是…
算了是吧，那好吧
不是，我只是不愿意亵渎自己的身体
生怕死后不能葬在犹太墓地里？
怕被老婆发现？
只是个纹身
又不是你另觅新欢
我从来没有过别的女人
妈呀
得把这列在清单上
不不，不行
整整66年？
我说老兄啊，看来我们得去好好爽一把
不要
爽，又不一定要出轨
我说了不要
我指的是那种专业的爽法
不要！
我不会在旁边陪着你的
你好啊，美人
-你要带她去兜风呢，还是要给她买衣裳？- 呵呵
只是先熟悉一下
我们这样没问题吧？
当然没问题，有问题又怎样？
我只是问问
来吧，来段欢快的，宝贝！看看她的本事
恩，我们的表现还不错
你这话的口气，就像参加初中舞会的娃娃
你这话的口气，就像想被人抽屁股的家伙
抽屁股？嘿嘿
你没那能力！
对付你足够了，小鸡米…荡起来！
你刚才是不是说了一句下流话？
我说了，又怎样？
哎唷！你要死别搭上我！
我存心的，又怎样？
你要死啊！
别逼我使坏啊
使坏？我让你看看什么才是使坏
让你见识一下埃维尔·克尼维尔的功夫（著名的摩托飞人）
学着点，胆小鬼！
敢叫我胆小鬼？
跑到天涯海角，也逃不出我的掌心！
接下来想干嘛？
你到底有多少钱啊？
有没有人告诉你…
问别人有多少钱是很不礼貌的事？
我从没遇到过能让我这么问的人
药物理疗
美，就一个字
我就喜欢这种感觉：飞掠极地上空…
下面是一片荒凉
下面是一片荒凉
那些星星…
真是造物主的杰作
你相信这一切都是某只大手创造的？
你不相信么？
相信的意思是不是说：当我抬起头望着天…
发着这样那样的誓言…
上苍就会帮我度过难关？
我不相信那个
要这么说，地球上95%的人都错了？
人生的阅历告诉我
95%的人总是错的
这叫做信念
老实说，我很妒忌那些有信念的人我的脑子就是接受不了这个
也许你的脑子正在慢慢接受呢
卡特，这个问题我们讨论过上百次
最后总是被同一堵墙挡住了去路
到底有没有甜蜜的天使？
到现在没有一个人能够穿过那堵墙
那么你相信什么呢？
我抵制所有的信仰
宇宙大爆炸？宇宙随机论？
我们出生
然后死去
历史的车轮滚滚向前
如果你错了怎么办？
我倒宁愿我错了
如果错的是我，我就赢了（暗指上天堂）
那可不一定哦
别以为这事情你比我更清楚
这只是我的信念
颂一声哈利路亚
还是换个话题吧
-知道鱼子酱是怎么做的么？- 难倒我了
雌性鲟鱼被捕捞之后…
渔夫要对她悉心照料，确保她死得安详
如果让鲟鱼感到一点点威胁…
母体就会分泌一种酸性化学物质，将卵破坏
听起来很像我的第三任老婆
有的女人还以为蛋黄酱长在树上
这种事，我能习惯的
这话听起来也很像我的第三任老婆
这地方我常来，都三十年了
还是第一次和男的一起来
受宠若惊啊
艾米丽10岁生日那次最难忘
艾米丽是谁？
我的小…
现在已经不小了
你有个女儿？
-你不是说…- 是说过，但是…
那时候我们还不熟
长话短说吧
…我们已经不来往了
你在干嘛？
现在是时候了
-不不不，把那条划掉- 为什么不做呢？
-快划掉- 为什么？
为什么？
没有为什么
-怎么了？- 失陪一下
你去哪儿？
像个娘儿们
听着，卡特…
对不起，我明白…
有时候我有点蛮横，而且…
天哪
-没关系，没事的- 怎么了？怎么回事？
导尿管接头脱落了，就这么回事
也许该去医院看看，卡特…
不是刚从该死的医院出来么
没事的，看见没，已经不流了我们走吧
看上去蛮好的，但是…
-我看我还是…- 跟我走就是了
-你直接上车- 别这样，来吧
好吧
-汤米，汤米哪儿去了？- 在客厅里，先生
哦，老天
你丫究竟有多少钱？
呃…我还不舍得把血弄在地毯上
我得找个地方，好好洗把热水澡
等洗完，又能焕然一新了
呃…你…那好吧
-汤米…- 好，那说定了？好，很好
虽然花了点时间，但我把计划重新安排好了
明天去开罗，然后在坦桑尼亚待两天周六到约翰内斯堡
按照您的指示，不看斗牛，也不猎老虎
汤玛斯，我很想说我离不开你…
但那是假的
我也很想说您很和蔼，我也很爱这份工作…
但那也是假的
恩，接了招就该还击
这就是名师出高徒啊
嘿，棒啊！在浴室里竟然有“危险”！
说的是电视节目，“危险”
“危险”!? 用法语问答？
哪位？
科尔先生？我是维吉尼亚·钱伯斯
哦，是你啊，呃，你好
我去叫卡特来听电话
事实上我想找你谈谈
哦
不知道…他还好么？
呃，是的，他…他很好
能问一下你们在哪儿么？
我们在法国，但明天…
把他还给我
维吉尼亚，能称呼你维吉尼亚么？
我不知道能不能…
我这么问，不是为了他
科尔先生…
我当了一辈子护士
数不清的人间悲剧就发生在我面前
作为女人，不该经受这么多痛苦
现在我丈夫也要走了，这一点我能接受
但我不能接受的是在他还活着的时候就失去他
-是豪迪·杜迪（木偶剧明星）- 答对了
-现在选题- “电视中的木偶角色”，400分
他们是一对木偶明星
在芝麻街系列中，他们是室友
-是伯特和厄尼- 是伯特和厄尼
【法语】请进！
他是希腊移民的后代
出生在马里兰州的陶森市
是斯皮罗·阿格纽
是斯皮罗·阿格纽（尼克松任内副总统，因贪污丑闻辞职）
看起来…
你好像在看…
“漂浮”节目啊
这是我第一次在没有角的浴缸里洗澡
真的？
知道么，啊咳，卡特，那什么，我在想…
关于那导尿管，以及其他一些事情…
也许我们该暂且放一放
别这样，我说了，别担心，我没事
不，我不是那个意思
我只是想说，如果你觉得离开会让我难受…
我想这对我没什么大不了的
维吉尼亚找过你了，是不是？
你认为我为什么跟你来？
因为我说动了你的心
你确实很厉害，但还没厉害到那程度
不是那样的
自从瑞秋离开家去上大学生活一下子就空出了许多
再也没有作业，没有家人对抗赛…
没有文艺演出，学校活动…
不再有孩子的哭闹，没有吵架也没有嬉戏时擦碰的伤口…
过了40年，第一次有了时间能与维吉尼亚静静相对…
远离一切喧嚣，抛却所有烦扰…
此时的我却再也找不回当初的那份感觉
当年执着她的手走过街头心中的那种感受已不再有
当然，她还是当初我爱的那个她并没有改变过
但这世界却改变了
同路走了那么久，才发现有些东西已经一逝不返了
明白么？
我选“电视中的木偶角色”，600分
口技表演艺术家埃德加·伯尔根曾为这木偶举办了一场同名演出
是“查理·麦卡锡”
-珊蒂？- 是“查理·麦卡锡”
（独唱）“丛林里，神圣的丛林里狮子今晚在休息”
（合唱）“丛林里，神圣的丛林里狮子今晚在休息”
看，那儿，那儿，那儿！
有件事让我很高兴…
爱德华决定删去清单上的第九个愿望
“猎一只狮子”
但他还是坚持要放几轮空枪过过瘾
事实证明，放一枪就够了
-碰- 哦，又碰，不碰白不碰
知道么…
史上唯一一只被闪电击中的狗就在埃及？
真希望我能在死之前遇见你
从理论上讲…
我们一次实现了两项愿望
“看看金字塔”…
以及“亲眼目睹神迹”
眼前的奇观已经近乎神迹了
等你看到我的神山再说吧
哦，是啊
你的神山
这个已经非常不错了
知道么，古埃及人对死亡有种美好的信念
当他们的灵魂到了天堂门口
神会问他们两个问题
天堂的门是否开放，取决于问题的答案
好吧，我来试试
是什么问题？
在你的生命中，是否有过快乐？
回答我
-我么？- 是的，就是你
-问题是：“我的生命中有没有快乐？”- 没错
有
那你这一生，有没有给别人带去快乐？
呃，这样的问题，我…
我不知道…
不知别人心里是怎么想的，所以…
问他们去吧
我问的是你
好罢
好罢
让我这么说好了
办了离婚，榨了我一笔抚养费之后…
艾米丽和她妈妈住在了一起
我曾想要维持原先密切的父女关系可这种关系渐渐沦为节日中的拜访…
电话中的寒暄，和贺卡上的祝辞我想你也明白
总之…
艾米丽后来上了大学还参加了什么救济穷人的组织…
还是救济动物，没所谓…
她遇见了一个男的，觉得自己爱上了他
这男的长得帅，人聪明，又上进
但我总觉得他有点问题
当女儿说他们已经订婚了我就告诉她，我反对此事
但作为我的女儿，她很自然的就…
按她自己的主见，和那男的结婚了
不消说，她没邀请我去参加婚礼
那一定很伤你的感情
你这么想？
他第一次打她之后，她来找我诉苦当时气得我想把那小子的脑袋打碎
她硬拦着我不让我去
她说她爱他，说不是他的错，只是喝了酒…
还说是她先挑起来的
第二次发生的时候，她没来找我
是前妻告诉我的能听见那女人的声音，我很高兴
你做了什么？
做了每个父亲都会做的事
我出手解决了
我让我的人又找了个人专门处理这种事情的人
我不知道他怎么交代的也不知道他怎么处理的
我只知道那男人没死
但我女儿从此再没听过那男人的消息
她对此事有何反应？
她不仅用最难听的话咒骂我的名字更没想到的是…
她还说她的爸爸已经死了
我做过的事，并不是每件都让我问心无愧
但要是再来一次，我肯定还会那么做的
如果因为女儿的恨才不让我上埃及天堂
那好吧，事情都这样了，我认了
至少我把两个问题答完了
我们怎么才能下去啊？
这位王后是莫卧儿王朝的第五位君王，吉罕王之妻
虽是一桩包办婚姻，但却彼此深爱
两人如胶似漆不离不弃，直到生第14个孩子时，她死于难产
不介意我叫你“雷”吧？
我的诤友，雷（源自影片“雨人”）
你有没有在听我说话？
当然在听啦
听你说了，14个孩子
两万名义工花了22年才完成这一建筑
大到亭台，小到砖瓦，都由君王亲自设计
这才是真爱
是真爱啊
一定很美妙
要是那“两万义工”的建筑公司是我的这事儿就难说了
葬礼之类的事情搞得我头都大了
尤其是这个问题：是埋还是烧
比如说埋了
我知道这关系不大，但是我有幽闭症
万一我醒过来，没人听见我呼救怎么办？
他们现在还造那种带铃铛的棺材吗？
呃……我想应该没有了
如果说烧了，烧完的灰怎么处理？
是埋了，撒了，还是摆在架子上？
或者放在花床上，顺着恒河漂流而下？
如果火把我烧疼了怎么办？
要我选，肯定选择烧
也许该把自己冻起来，就像沃特·迪斯尼
不，还是烧了好
骨灰放进罐头，埋在一个风景秀丽的地方
放进罐头？
嗯，我不喜欢骨灰瓮这个瓮字的发音
真的？那你对墓窖这个词过敏么？
那倒没有
有个巧福豆罐头做归宿就不错了
巧福豆（Chock Fullo'Nuts）咖啡“天堂出品的咖啡”
以你的财富，也买不到比这更好的咖啡
别太肯定了
哦，好吧
鲁瓦克咖啡（Kopi Luwak）？
你对鲁瓦克咖啡有看法？
太奢侈了，不合我的胃口
哦是嘛，对诤友雷而言，太奢侈了啊
-碰- 靠
你总是一手好牌
这儿就是中国！
只有亲眼看到，才能领略真正的神迹
看见那个老太太了吗？
奇怪的是，我们要死在她前面
乐观的念头
当然，如果那套系统起作用的话
她还能转世投胎呢
佛教徒相信每个人都在经历不断的转世
是转成向更高还是更低层次的生命取决于你今世的修行
看见没，这就是我跟不上的地方
你说，一只蜗牛该做些什么才能转成更高层次的生命呢？
留下一道完美的粘液痕迹？
要听坏消息，还是更坏的消息？
我选第一个
山上有暴风雪
哦，汤姆，谢谢你的好心相告我们连外面是什么都看不清楚
他们不准我们飞上去，得等到转晴
预计什么时候才能转晴？
呃，明年春天的某个时候吧
这就是我刚才说的“更坏的消息”
那就下次吧
好
明年春天…
现在怎么办？
要我说，也许你的神山想表达一些讯息
什么意思？
也许我们离开太久了
离开太久了？谁离开太久了？
哦，我明白你意思了
这山想说的，不是让我们回家
而是想让你跟我说，让我回家，对吧？
-对- 混账老东西
各人自扫门前雪，休管他人瓦上霜听见没？
好吧，好吧，不用对我心焦气躁的
-下一站是哪儿？- 下一站，香港
丝绸衣服和黑胡桃冰淇淋！
西藏人称之为“珠穆朗玛峰”意思是“冰雪的圣母”
实际上是“大地的圣母”
在古藏语里就是这意思
我知错，我改正
请给我一杯黑皮诺
听你这么说，是不是去过？
呃，这个…事实上我刚离开那儿
我们本来想上去的，但天气…
这个季节去爬山，晚了点
他们也是这么说的
-我叫安吉里卡- 哦，我是卡特
抱歉，我这么问可能没教养…
您这年纪去爬大山，是不是太成熟了点？
“成熟”，这说法倒蛮合适的
那什么，我倒是上去过
-真的啊？- 恩
在队伍被迫下撤之前，我爬到了两万六千英尺（约八千米）的地方
-真的啊？- 恩
什么感觉？
冷的很…
-恩- 这是主要的感觉
在白天，天空是黑黝黝的蓝色…
因为没有足够的空气来折射阳光
但到了晚上…从来也没见过那么多星星
有些星星熠熠闪亮，似乎伸手可及
像是透光的小洞，洞的那头是天堂
-那你听见了没有？- 听见什么？
我读过一本登顶者写的书
书里说他站在世界之巅…
感受到一种深邃的寂静
感受到一种深邃的寂静
就像所有声音都消失了一样
就在那时，他听见了…
听见了什么？
山的声音
他说那感觉，就像聆听上帝的话语
我以前从没这么做过
这话听上去很老套，但是…
…我在楼上有个房间
呃，那个…
我想…
我…
我很感激
但是…
她太幸运了
我觉得幸运的人应该是我
真为你高兴
汤姆？
等你老了，记得三件事：
想尿别谦让…
硬了就快上屁要小心放
小的会牢记在心，直到油尽灯枯的那一天
嘿嘿，那样就对了
我们回家
你说啥？
我现在就想回家
但我还想…丝绸衣服怎么办？
你太鬼了，爱德华
你怎么知道我过不了这关？
我不知道
为你骄傲
没人在意你会怎么想
美国…
嘿，汤米，回家不该走这条路啊
10号公路上有车祸，只好走地面道路了
哦
我们为什么停下？
哦，老天
他一直在暗中照看她，等你哪天想…
这是你的主意嘛，汤姆？
不，这是我的主意，是我说服了他
-哦，是你说服了他- 喂
等一等，爱德华，爱德华！等等
爱德华，你干嘛那么害怕？
我只想告诉你一个故事又没叫你在里面瞎掺和
哦，就像酒吧里的那姑娘？
-那是两码事- 怎么个两码事？
-就是两码事！- 有什么区别？
我是个什么人，你根本没概念！
我从白手起家到今天的亿万身价！
连总统都要征询我的看法
我和王室成员共进过晚餐还要问我该如何理解？
想让这趟旅行变得对我有意义？
好比说，改变我的人生？
你认为事情该怎么发展，卡特？我敲门，然后她开门…
她先是很惊讶，然后开始发火…
但我还要说，我有多么爱她多么想她
哦对了，“顺便说一句，我马上要死了…
所以才来找你，我不想孤零零的死”？
凡人都害怕孤零零的死去
我不是凡人！
这次旅行本来应该很有趣
曾经是的，但现在全完了
不，你下车，打的去吧
慈爱的天父：我们在此向你表示感谢
是你让我们全家得以重聚
主啊，感谢你领回了我的丈夫孩子们的父亲
感谢你将他还给我们
他在哭？
我不知道
他以前很搞笑的
-稍等片刻- 怎么？
-我准备了一件东西- 哦？
不知我该不该拿出来
拿出来吧
那好…
你知道上一次到现在有多久了？
难道我想知道？
恩，实在是太久太久了
我感觉自己又成了青少年就像我们的第一次
我们要真的是青少年就好了在客厅里就杀的昏天黑地了
我还记得第一次的时候
都不知道什么叫矜持
你在我身上，就像…那个样子
卡特？
开始跟我玩捉迷藏了？那好
卡特！
将康复中心转卖给菲利普医疗集团之后
我们的现金资产将增加15%
科尔先生？
科尔先生？
你们有谁读过《神曲》?
您说什么，先生？
神曲，里面写了作者但丁的地狱之旅
也许我们该休息一下
不需要休息
我的病正在好转，我是医疗史的奇迹
我只想问问…
你们有没有读过神曲
先生，有个电话找您
汤米，现在不行
我认为您应该接这个电话
嘿，爱德华
预后诊断如何？
病灶已迁移至他的大脑
迁移……有救么？
手术成功率无法达到理想水平
成功率…
天哪
他怎么样？
他还好
对了，他想让我把这个交给你
我本该以后再给你的，等到…
但我后来转念一想…
她从来就不听我的
就靠这招赢的我，不改也罢
你看上去糟透了，雷
谢谢
他们待你怎么样？
豌豆汤和以前一样难吃
我会找负责人谈的
这事就交给你了
我能喝点水么？
你现在不能喝水帮你拿点柠檬味的棉球来好不好？
好吧
你还在喝那种奢侈的咖啡？
什么？
你怎么了，还惦记着那个？
读读这个
“鲁瓦克咖啡是世界上最昂贵的咖啡
“但对某些人来说，这种咖啡的完美有些‘脱离现实’
“在出产咖啡的苏门答腊村落周围
“有一种野生树猫，名叫麝香猫
“这种猫以咖啡果实为食，果肉消化后…
“咖啡豆从粪便中排出
“村民将猫的粪便收集处理才有了这种咖啡
“咖啡豆原有的醇厚浓香经过猫肠胃的消化发酵
“才形成了鲁瓦克咖啡无与伦比的口感（鲁瓦克是当地人对麝香猫的称谓）
…和香味”
你在损我吧
这猫太强了，我算服了
-有笔吗？给我一支笔- 什么？
什么？
（笑到流眼泪）
给你
单子上的事还没做完
这不是一个人的事情
恐怕只能靠你了
准备好了
我就在这儿等你回来
这话听着真舒服
亲爱的爱德华：这几日我一直在犹豫
究竟该不该把我想说的写下来
最后我想，如果不写，我一定会后悔
所以才有了这封信
记得你我最后一次相见…
可以说是不欢而散
以如此的方式收场，当然不是我的本意
这事儿责任在我，在此我说声抱歉
但说实话，如果再给我一次机会我还是会做出相同的决定
维吉尼亚说，我走的时候像个陌生人回来时又成了她最爱的丈夫
关于这一点，我欠你的情
你为我做的一切，我无以回报
既然如此，我索性直接开口求你再为我做一件事
请你去寻找生命中的快乐
你曾经说，你并非凡人
这话是没错
你当然不是凡人
但每个人都是凡人
我的牧师总说：
“我们的生命就像小溪…
最后汇入同一条大河…
大河尽头的瀑布之上，在迷雾后若隐若现的就是天堂”
-你好啊，宝贝- 嗨
寻找你生命中的快乐吧，爱德华
（亲吻世界上最美丽的女孩）
我亲爱的朋友…
闭上眼睛，让流水带你回家吧
下午好，我是爱德华·科尔
我不知道多数人在这种场合会说些什么
因为，老实说
我一直有意回避这种场合
用最简单的话来说…
我爱他，也很想念他
卡特和我一起周游了世界
人生真的很奇妙
因为就在三个月之前…
我们两个还未尝谋面，更谈不上相识
（出于善意，帮助陌生人）
我希望…
下面的话不会让你们觉得我很自私
他生命中最后的几个月
也是我生命中最棒的几个月
他拯救了我的生活
而且这一点他早就明白
这个男人认为，能与我相识，很值
为此，我深感自豪
最后
我可以坦然的说，我们彼此给对方的生活都带去了快乐
等到有一天…
我走到生命的终点
发现自己站在那堵有门的大墙之外
我希望卡特也在那儿
为我做见证（“巧福豆”咖啡罐头）
将通往门内的路指给我看
爱德华·佩里曼·科尔在五月离世
那是一个周日的下午
晴空万里无云
终年八十一岁
（见识真正的神迹）
人生的意义究竟是什么？我到现在也无法下定论
但我至少能这么说：
我知道，他在离世的时候合上了双眼
却敞开了心灵
我还敢肯定的是他对自己的终憩之地非常满意
因为那地方是一片雪山
埋在那儿是违法的
