幽默故事,能让你在信手翻启间开怀一笑,得到身心的彻底放松、心绪的怦然萌动、情感的欣然释放。下面小编为大家带来风趣幽默的英语故事三则,欢迎大家阅读!
风趣幽默英语故事:电子邮件A man left for a vacation to Jamaica.
有个人去牙买加度假,
His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day.
他的妻子正好出差,所以打算在他到之后的第二天去找他。
When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail message.
他到了宾馆,想要给妻子发封邮件,
Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory.
但是记着邮箱的纸找不到了,于是他凭着记忆把信发到了一个邮箱。
Unfortunately, he missed one letter, and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife whose husband had passed away only the day before.
很不幸,他漏掉了一个字母,因此他的信发到了一个老传教士的妻子的邮箱里,而传教士恰好在前一天去世了。
When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor dead.
悲痛的老妇人察看邮箱,看着显示器屏幕她尖叫一声,随后就倒在地上死去了。
At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen: "Dearest Wife, Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.
听到她的声音,家人赶忙跑进她的房间,只见这样一句话显示在屏幕上:“亲爱的,快来吧。为了你明天的到来,一切都准备好了。爱你的丈夫。
Your Loving Husband. P.S. Sure is hot down here."
顺便说一句,这里可真够热的。”
风趣幽默英语故事:墓地惊魂One dark night two guys were walking home after a party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery.
一个漆黑的夜晚,两个小伙子参加完聚会,决定抄近路穿过一片坟地走回家。
When they got to about the middle of the graveyard they were startled and stopped moving. There was this terrifying noise, “TAP-TAP-TAP” coming from the shadows.
走到坟地的中间,从阴暗处传出来恐怖的“嗒、嗒、嗒”声音,吓得他们再也走不动了。
Trembling with fear, they spotted an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.
浑身颤抖着,他们发现有个老人正拿着榔头和凿子凿一块墓碑。
"Holy cow, Mister,” one of them said after catching his breath.
“噢,主啊,”其中一个屏住呼吸说,
“You SCARED us half to death. We thought you were a GHOST! What are you doing working here so late at night?"
“你吓死我们了,我们还以为你是鬼了。这么晚了你在这干什么呢?”
"Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!!"
“这些傻瓜!”老人抱怨说,“他们拼错了我的名字!”
风趣幽默英语故事:油是免费的I stopped at a fast food restaurant recently.
有一次我走进一家快餐店,
I was fascinated by a sign which offered Fat Free French Fries.
被一个标志牌吸引了,上面写着“无油薯条”。
I decided to give them a try.
我打算尝尝,
I was dismayed when the clerk pulled a basket of fries from the fryer which were dripping with fat.
但是看到服务员从锅里捞出的一篮薯条沾满了油,真是吓了我一大跳。
He filled a bag with these fries and put them in my order.
他给我装了一袋,账单上显示出价钱。
"Just a minute!" I said. 'Those aren't fat free." "Yes, they are. We only charge for the potatoes.... The fat is free!"
“等会儿,”我说,“这不是无油的?”“是的,我们只对薯条收费,油是免费的!”