爱华网幽默与笑话同是社会交往活动中不可缺少的交际手段。下面小编整理了超短英语笑话，希望大家喜欢!
超短英语笑话摘抄
守门员(中英)
The local football team I had just joined needed me to play goalkeeper in their next Saturday match. Because I was late completing the registration forms I was not yet officially a member, so I was told to tell anyone who asked that my name was Les Faulkner-a member of the team who wasn’t playing. That Saturday，during a quiet interval in my goal area, a man appeared behind the net. “Hello ,”he said to me.“What’s your name?”“Les Faulkner,”I replied. “Nice to meet you,” said the man. “I’m your father.”
我参加的那个地方足球队要我在星期六的比赛中当守门员。可我没能及时的填好登记表，所以没能成为正式的队员。所以他们告诉我，如果有人问我是谁的话，我就告诉他，我叫利斯·弗克尼，一名当时不在场的队员。星期六那天，在比赛间隙，有一个男人出现在了球网的后面。他对我说:“喂，你叫什么名字?”“利斯·弗克尼。”“哦，很高兴见到你，”这个男人说:“我是你爸爸。”
超短英语笑话鉴赏
请张开嘴(中英)
Doctor: Please open your mouth, Madam.
医生:”请张开嘴，女士。”
Lady: Thank you very much, doctor.
女士:“非常感谢您，医生。”
Doctor: Why do you thank me?
医生:“为什么要感谢我呢?”
Lady: Because my husband always asked me to shut up.
女士:“因为我的丈夫总是叫我把嘴闭上。”
超短英语笑话赏析
最长与最短(中英)
A teacher asked one of his students: "What is the longest and what is the shortest?"
老师问他的一个学生:“什么最长，什么最短?”
The student answered immediately: "The last several minutes of a class is the longest, while the last several minutes of an exam is the shortest.”
一个学生马上回答说:“下课前的几分钟最长了，考试前的儿分钟最短。”
超短英语笑话欣赏
一元钱(中英)
The teacher asked Tom:"Why did you come to school so late this morning?"
老师问汤姆:“今天早上你为什么迟到了?”
"Someone lost one dollar.”Answered Tom.
“有个人丢了一块钱。”汤姆回答说。
"Oh，now I know money ,”the teacher you helped him find said.
“噢，我知道了，你帮助他找钱了。”老师说。
"No,I stood on the money until the person went away," was Tom's reply.
“我一直站在那一块钱上，直到所有的人都走了。”汤姆回答说。
超短英语笑话品味
洗脸(中英)
Teacher: David，why don’t you wash your facie`? I can see what you had for breakfast this morning?
老师:“戴维，你为什么不洗洗你的脸呢?我都看得出来你今天一早上吃的是什么。”
David: What was it?
戴维:“我吃什么了呢?”
Teacher: Eggs.
老师:“鸡蛋。”
David: Wrong, teacher. That was yesterday.
戴维:“不对，老师，那是我昨天吃的。”
超短英语笑话阅读
伟大的科学家(中英)
Teacher; Can you tell me anything about the great scientists of the 18th century?
老师:“谁能告诉我有关十八世纪的伟大科学家的一些事情呢?
Pupil: Yes, sir, I can. They are all dead.
学生:“老师，我可以，他们都死了。”
超短英语笑话学习
太快与太慢(中英)
A man traveling at 130 miles per hour on the road was stopped by traffic police.
一个男人把车开到了每小时130英里的时速。警察把他拦了一下来。
“Sorry, officer.” Said the driver, “Was I driving too fast?”
“对不起，警官，”司机说，“我是不是开得太快了?”
“No, sir. You were flying too slow.”
“没有，先生，你只是飞得太慢了。”
