三分钟笑话大全爆笑 爆笑三分钟英语笑话精选

拥有丰富的百科知识和认知操作是听者解读内涵笑话的基础。下面是小编带来的三分钟英语笑话,欢迎阅读!

三分钟英语笑话精选

交通运输工具上的工程(中英)

The National Transportation Safety Board recently divulged they had covertly funded a project with the U. S. auto maker for the past five years, whereby the auto makers were installing black boxes in four heel drive pick一up trucks in an effort to determine, in fatal accidents, the circumstances in the last 15 seconds before the crash.

国家交通运输安全委员会最近宣布,在过去的五年中他们秘密资助美国汽车制造商进行了一项工程。汽车制造商们为四轮轻便小卡车安装了黑匣子,这样就可以知道在重大的交通事故发生前最后}S秒钟的情况。

They were surprised to find in 49 of the 50 states the last words of drivers in 74.7 percent of fatal crashes were, "Oh, Shit!”

他们惊奇地发现,在50个州中的49个,有74.7%的司机在发生严重的碰撞前,说的最后一个词是“该死的!”

Only the state of Texas was different, where 92. 3 percent of the final words were, "Hey Y’all,hold my beer and watch this!"

只有德克萨斯州的司机与众不同,92. 3%的德州司机的最后一句话是:“嘿,伙计,拿好我的啤酒,小心!”

三分钟英语笑话阅读

纪念日(中英)

When Bill and Hillary first got married, Bill said, "I am putting a box under our bed. You must promise never to look in it.” In all their 30 years of marriage, Hillary never looked. However, on the afternoon of their 30th anniversary, curiosity got the better of her and she lifted the lid and peeked inside. In the box there were 3 empty beer cans and $1,874.25 in cash.

三分钟笑话大全爆笑 爆笑三分钟英语笑话精选

比尔和希拉里刚结婚的时候,比尔说:“我在我们的床下放了一个盒子。你要答应我不打开看。”他们结婚三十年了,希拉里一直都没有打开过那个盒子。可在他们结婚30周年纪念日的下午,希拉里再也忍不住她的好奇心了,她掀起了盒子盖,偷偷地往里看。盒子里面有三个空的啤酒罐和1874. 25美元的现金。

After dinner, Hillary could no longer contain her guilt and she confessed, saying, "I am so sorry. For all these years I kept my promise and never looked in the box under our bed. However, today the temptation was too much and I gave in. But now I need to know why do you keep the empty cans in the box? "

晚饭后,希拉里再也掩盖不住自己的愧疚感了。她对比尔坦白说:十分抱歉,这么多年以来我一直遵守诺言没有打开我们床底下的那个盒子。可是今天,我再也禁不住诱惑了。我现在想知道你为什么在盒子里保存了三个空瓶子?”

Bill thought for a while and said, "I guess that after all these years you deserve to know the truth. Whenever I was unfaithful to you, I put an empty beer can in the box under the bed to remind myself not to do it again.”

比尔想了想说:“我想经过了这么多年,你也应该知道真相了。每当我做了对不起你的事情,我就会往床底下的盒子里放一个瓶子,用这个来提醒我不能再继续错了。”

Hillary was shocked, but said," I am very disappointed and saddened, but I guess after all those years away from home on the road, temptation does happen and I guess that 3 times is not that bad considering the number of years we've been together.”

希拉里大吃一惊,可她说:“我很失望和难过,可我想你一直在外奔波了这么多年,一定会遇到很多外界的诱惑,比起我们在一起相处的这么多年,3次又算得了什么呢。”

They hugged and made their peace. A little while later, Hillary asked Bill, "So why do you have all that money in the box?"

他们拥抱在了一起,一切又恢复了平静。过了一会儿,希拉里问比尔:“那么为什么盒子里还有那么多钱呢?”

Bill answered,"Well, whenever the box filled up with empty cans, I took them to the recycling center and redeemed them for cash.”

比尔回答说:“只要盒子里装满了空瓶子,我就把它们拿到回收站去换成现金。”

三分钟英语笑话学习

逛购物中心(中英)

A boy and his father visiting from a third world country were at Lakeside Mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again.

一对来自第三世界国家的父子来到了湖岸购物中心。他们被眼前的一切惊呆了,特别是两面发光的银墙,这墙不但可以分开,还可以合上。

The boy asked his father, "What is this father?" The father responded, "Son I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is!”

儿子问父亲:“爸爸,这是什么?”爸爸回答说:“儿子,我这辈子还从来没见过这东西呢,我也不知道这是什么。”

While the boy and his father were watching wide一eyed an old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving wails and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction. The walls opened up again and a voluptuous 24 years old woman stepped out.

这对父子睁大了眼睛,他们看见一位坐轮椅的老太太,摇到那面会移动的墙面前按了一下按钮,墙打开了,老太太摇着轮椅从两面墙的中间穿了过去,进了一个小屋子里。墙合上了。男孩和他的爸爸看到墙上闪动着的写有数字的小圆灯在向上移动。他们又看到那小圆灯又向相反的方向移动。墙打开了,从里面走出一位约24岁迷人的女人。

The father said to his son, "Go to get your mother".

爸爸对儿子说:“走,快去把你妈叫来。”

  

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