英语美文精选 故事类 关于英语笑话短故事精选

英语美文精选 故事类 关于英语笑话短故事精选

英语笑话能反映出一个民族的价值系统及其对周围世界肯定和否定的态度。本文是关于英语笑话短故事,希望对大家有帮助!

关于英语笑话短故事:Bishop Creighton 克莱顿主教

Creighton was going along a West End square when he saw a little fellow trying to reach the knocker of a large house.

Can't you reach up so high? queried the Bishop kindly.

No, sir, said the small youngster.

Well, then, let me help you, and the Bishop mounted the three steps and gave a splendid rattat(砰砰声) .

The little boy glanced hastily(匆忙地) at the gentleman of the cloth. Come on, he yelled, we must both run.

当克莱顿主教沿着伦敦西区的一个广场走着的时候,他 看见一个小家伙正试图抓住一所大房子的门环。

你是不是够不到这么高的地方呢?主教好意地问。

是的,先生。那小孩说。

那好,让我来帮你。主教登上那三级台阶,在门上重重扣了几下。

那个小男孩急忙给教士递上一个眼色。快跑,他喊着:我们俩都得跑。

关于英语笑话短故事:Who was the first man?

谁是第一个男人

A teacher said to her class:

Who was the first man?

George Washington, a little boy shouted promptly.

How do you make out that George Washington was the first man? asked the teacher, smiling indulgently.

Because, said the little boy, he was first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts of his countrymen.

But at this point a larger boy held up his hand.

Well, said the teacher to him, who do you think was the first man?

I don't know what his name was, said the larger boy, but I know it wasn't George Washington, ma'am, because the history book says George Washington married a widow, so, of course, there must have been a man ahead of him.

有个老师问班上的学生:

谁是第一个男人?

乔治·华盛顿,一个小男孩当即叫道。

你怎么知道乔治·华盛顿是第一个男人呢?老师问道,宽容地微笑着。

小男孩说:因为他是战时第一,和时第一,国人心中第一。

这时一个大点儿的男孩举起手来。

那么,老师对他说,你认为谁是第一个男人呢?

我不知道他的名字,大点儿的男孩说,但我知道不是乔治·华盛顿,老师。因为历史书上说,乔治·华盛顿娶了一个寡妇,所以在他前面肯定还有一个男人。

关于英语笑话短故事:Father's Advice

It's the Spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date. He's a pretty hip guy with his own car. When he goes to the front door, the girl's father answers and invites him in. "Carrie's not ready yet, so why don't you have a seat?" he says.

"That's cool" says Bobby. Carrie's father asks Bobby what they're planning to do.

Bobby replies politely that they will probably just go to the soda shop or a movie.

Carrie's father responds, "Why don't you two go out and screw? I hear all the kids are doing it." Naturally this comes as quite a surprise to Bobby so he asks Carrie's dad to repeat it.

"Yeah," says Carrie's father, "Carrie really likes to screw; she'll screw all night if we let her!"

Well, this just made Bobby's eyes light up, and his plan for the evening was beginning to look pretty good.

A few minutes later, Carrie comes downstairs in her little poodle skirt and announces that she's ready to go. Almost breathless with anticipation, Bobby escorts his date out the front door.

About 20 minutes later, Carrie rushes back into the house, slams the door behind her, and screams at her father, "DAMMIT DADDY! IT'S CALLED THE TWIST!!!"

关于英语笑话短故事:Tell a lie

Mom: "Which banana do you want, Victor?"

Victor: "I want that one of the greatest."

Mom: "Victor, you should be polite, to have that little one."

Victor: "Mom, I must lie to be polite?"

妈妈:“你要哪一只香蕉,维克多?”

维克多:“我要那只最大的。”

妈妈:“维克多,你应该懂礼貌,要那只小的。”

维克多:“妈妈,难道懂礼貌就必须说谎吗?”

关于英语笑话短故事:I hope your bread gets better

我希望您的面包病好了

I was making rolls and, needing a warm place for the dough to rise, put the bowl in a heating pad. Then I left the house on an errand(使命,差事) . When I came back, I found this note from my son: "Dear Mom, I hope your bread gets better."

我在做面包,需要把面团放在一个暖和点的地方使它发起来。我把面盆放在电热褥里,后来就出去干别的活去了。等我回家时,发现儿子留下一张纸条,上面写着:“亲爱的妈妈,我希望您的面包已经病好了。”

  

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