适合小学生健康的笑话 适合小学的英语笑话欣赏

近些年,冷笑话作为一种特殊的幽默方式在互联网、电视节目、书籍杂志上广泛流传。小编精心收集了适合小学的英语笑话,供大家欣赏学习!

适合小学的英语笑话:Deer Hunting

It was Saturday morning as Jake, an avid hunter, woke up raring to go bag the first deer of the season.

He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise, he finds his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage.

Jake asks her, "What are you up to?"

Alice smiles, "I'm going hunting with you!"

Jake, though he had many reservations about this, reluctantly decides to take her along.

Three hours later they arrive at a game preserve just outside of San Marcos,Texas.

Jake sets his lovely wife safely up in the tree stand and tells her, "If you see a deer, take careful aim on it and I'll come running back as soon as I hear the shot."

Jake walks away with a smile on his face knowing that Alice couldn't bag an elephant -- much less a deer.

Not 10 minutes pass when he is startled as he hears an array of gunshots.

Quickly, Jake starts running back. As Jake gets closer to her stand, he hears Alice screaming, "Get away from my deer!"

Confused and frightened Jake races faster towards his screaming wife. And again he hears her yell, "Get away from my deer now!" followed by another volley of gunfire!

Now within sight of where he had left his wife, Jake is surprised to see a Texas cowboy, with his hands high in the air.

The cowboy, obviously distraught, says, "Okay, lady! You can have your f#@ken deer! Just let me get my saddle off it!"

适合小学的英语笑话:Catching the bear

Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it.

The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could. He ran pretty fast but the bear was just a little faster and gained on him with every step. Just as he reached the open cabin door, he tripped and fell flat.

Too close behind to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling into the cabin.

The man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, "You skin this one while I go and get another!"

适合小学的英语笑话:Need fishing licenses

A couple of young fellers were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bush's jumped the Game Warden !!

Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods, and hot on his heels came the Game Warden.

After about a half mile the fella stopped and stooped over with his hands on his thighs to catch his breath and the Game Warden finally caught up to him.

"Lets see yer fishin license, Boy !!" the Warden gasped.

With that, the fella pulled out his wallet and gave the Game Warden a valid fishing license..

"Well, son", said the Game Warden, " You must be about as dumb as a box of rocks !! You don't have to run from me if you have a valid license!"

适合小学生健康的笑话 适合小学的英语笑话欣赏

"Yes Sir", replied the young feller," But my friend back there, well, he don't have one"...

适合小学的英语笑话:Dropped your wallet

Two fishermen were out on the lake when one of them dropped his wallet. As they watched the wallet float down to the depths of the lake, a carp came along and snatched up the wallet. Soon came another carp who stole it away and then a third joined in. Remarked one of the fisherman, "That's the first time I've ever seen carp-to-carp walleting."

适合小学的英语笑话:Want to be healed?

Three guys were fishing in a lake one day, when an angel appeared in the boat.

When the three astonished men had settled down enough to speak, the first guy asked the angel humbly, "I've suffered from back pain ever since I took shrapnel in the Vietnam War ... Could you help me?"

"Of course," the angel said, and when he touched the man's back, the man felt relief for the first time in years.

The second guy who wore very thick glasses and had a hard time reading and driving. He asked if the angel could do anything about his poor eyesight. The angel smiled, removed the man's glasses and tossed them into the lake. When they hit the water, the man's eyes cleared and he could see everything distinctly.

When the angel turned to the third guy, the guy put his hands out defensively -- "Don't touch me!" he cried, "I'm on a disability pension."

  

爱华网本文地址 » http://www.aihuau.com/a/258761/487152270.html

更多阅读

适合小学生看的电影动画片 小学生爱看的电影

适合小学生看的电影动画片1、《料理鼠王》简介:迪斯尼与皮克斯双剑合璧,还有比它们合作出的动画片更值得期待的吗?如今合而为一、磨合完毕的两动画巨头,打起了一只名叫“蔬菜杂烩”的小老鼠的主意。皮克斯的三维技术别家公司绝对望尘

适合小学生看的影片推荐 - 小学生禁毒教育影片

适合小学生看的影片推荐适合小学生看的影片推荐《少年雷锋》 上海电影制片厂《驴嘎上电视》 北京电影制片厂《小象西娜》 上海电影制片厂《鹤童》 中央电视台、黑龙江电影制片厂(二)适合中小学生观看的影片《孤儿泪》 北京电影制片厂

收集的适合小学生看的笑话(一) 适合小学生听的笑话

关键时刻要勇敢爸爸给五岁的儿子讲故事:“美国有个青年独自在树林砍柴,不小心一条大腿被压在大树下无法脱身。为了活命,他毅然用锯子锯断了那条大腿,死里逃生。儿子,这个故事告诉我们,关键时刻要作出勇敢的抉择。”  儿子:“爸爸,如果是

转载 适合小学生阅读的杂志 适合小学生订阅的杂志

原文地址:适合小学生阅读的杂志作者:张云兵《读友》(少年文学)·培育高雅文学品味,享受时尚阅读乐趣!读者对象:小学中、高年级学生,初中生半月刊,大32开,160页+四封,彩色+黑白印刷,定价5.5元,邮发代号:80-664杂志博客: http://blog.sina.com.cn

声明:《适合小学生健康的笑话 适合小学的英语笑话欣赏》为网友生人勿近分享!如侵犯到您的合法权益请联系我们删除