爱华网9 Relationship Mistakes that Women Make
婚姻关系中女性常犯的9个错误
A relationship is as it’s people are, imperfect, flawed, but mostly unique
人与人之间的关系就像个体本身一样，不完美，有缺陷，但却是独一无二的。
Every relationship is unique. Sometimes women do things, often without realizing it, that can impair a relationship. Here are a few things to keep in mind.
每种关系都是独一无二的。有时候女人会做一些损害一段关系的事,自己却往往意识不到。这里有几件需要牢记于心的注意事项：
Stop Undervaluing Yourself
不要低估自己
It’s very easy to be vulnerable and insecure in today’s world. You are constantly required to prove yourself and face success and failure almost successively. It is therefore easy to diminish one’s self esteem and self worth. Try not to undervalue yourself. Know that you are worth everything in the world and that everything you get, you deserve.
在当今世界，人们很容易脆弱且缺乏安全感。你需要不断地证明自己，还要不断面对成功与失败。因此，削弱一个人的自尊和自我价值就变得极其容易。尽量不要低估自己。要知道，你值得拥有世上的一切，你也值得拥有现在所得到的一切。
Stop Relying Completely On Your Partner
不要完全依赖你的伴侣
To lean on someone for support isn’t bad, however to depend on someone to the extent that they become a crutch is a very unhealthy idea that then makes your self-worth, your emotional stability and your happiness dependent on something you have no control over. Do rely on your partner for support, not for neediness .
依赖别人的支持并不是件坏事。然而非常依赖某人，以至于他成了你离不开的拐杖，却是十分不好的做法，这些让你的自我价值，情绪以及你的快乐依靠某种你完全无法控制的东西上。要适当依赖你伴侣的支持，而不是依赖的无法自拔。
Stop Neglecting Communication
不要忽略交流
Sometimes it’s hard to understand someone. This is especially true if you’re upset, angry, or sad so it’s easier to just drop the topic of conversation. However it is always a good idea to talk, ask, communicate in a relationship especially if you feel like your cannot understand your partner’s need or his way of communicating. Doing so will strengthen your relationship and give both of you a better idea of each other.
有的时候理解他人确实不易。尤其是你在不安，愤怒或悲伤时，更容易停止对话，相对无言。然而，如果你感觉无法理解对方的需求或是无法理解对方说话的方式，那就多交谈，询问。交流可是个不错的主意哦。这样做会巩固你们之间的关系，让你俩更加了解对方。
Stop Trying to Change Him
不要试着改变他
Men and women in our generation and that preceding ours, are quite different in the way they think, act, and behave. Not everyone , of course, but a lot of them. There will be things about your partner that you’ll like and there will be some you don’t. You would’ve probably preferred it if he didn’t have those traits, however, now that he does, take them with a pinch of salt and try to get used to them. Don’t try to change him to your liking, instead focus more on what you like and less on what you don’t!
我们这一代以及前几代的男人女人们，他们的思维，行为，表现都大相径庭。当然，并不是每个人都这样，只是其中的一部分。你的伴侣身上有你喜欢的地方，也有你讨厌的地方。也许你希望他没有这些让你讨厌的特质。但是，既然他确实有，那就接受它们，尽量去适应它们。不要根据自己的喜好企图改变他，而要多关注你喜欢的，不去关注不喜欢的东西。
Stop Denying What He Does for You
不要否定他为你做的
Some men are familiar with women’s ideas of romantic. However, most men, though absolutely loving, seldom keep up with a woman’s definition of romantic. Keep in mind that just because he doesn’t know the things you didn’t tell him, doesn’t make him uncaring. If there is something you want him to do, just tell him straight up. It’ll make your life easier and his too!
有些男人比较熟悉女人们浪漫的想法。然而，大多数男人，即使是在热恋中，也很少有人的思维能跟上女人们对浪漫的定义。请记住，这只是因为他不懂你没告诉过他的东西，不是因为他不在乎你。如果你有想要他做的事，请直接告诉他。这会使你俩都过得轻松。
Stop Being Too Picky Over Things You Can’t Control
不要对你无法控制的事务过于挑剔
Memories are created by those who don’t fret the little details. Seldom do things in life go just the way you want them to. Getting upset when plans are changed is very normal, however to brood over those changes or throw tantrums or have constant snide remarks can ruin a memory in progress and spoil yours and your partner’s mood. Unless the change in plans is something you absolutely cannot accept and adversely affects your health or your safety, try to not sweat the details and instead enjoy the time with what can now be a surprise element!
回忆属于那些不被细小事务烦恼的人们。生命中很少有事情会完全照着你所希望的方式来走。由于计划变更而变得焦虑不安是很正常的。然而过多关注这些改变，大发脾气或是不断地冷嘲热讽可以摧毁当下的一段记忆，破坏你和同伴的情绪。除非这种计划上的改变是你绝对无法接受的，或是严重影响到你的健康和安危时，试着不要纠结于细节，而要享受当下一切惊喜的东西。
Stop Trying to Tie Him Down
不要束缚他
As a way of ensuring security within the relationship, often some women tend to demand long term commitments. There is of course nothing wrong with wanting a secure lasting relationship, however you must bear in mind that by tying him down, you too will be tied down to a man. We all change and evolve as individuals and though the notion of growing old with someone or of marrying your high school sweetheart may seen enticing, it isn’t for everyone. So give yourself time and also him. To strengthen your relationship and eliminate the sense of insecurity, talk to your partner and together figure out a way to make you feel more secure.
有些女人为了确保恋爱关系不出意外，往往要求对方做出长期的承诺。当然，想要一个安全持久的关系无可厚非，但是，你必须牢记，他被你捆绑后，其实你同时也被他束缚了。我们都在不断发展和变化中。尽管和某人白头到老或和高中恋人结婚会令人羡慕不已，但并不是每个人都如此。所以请给自己和对方时间，巩固你们之间的关系，消除不安全感的顾虑，和他交流，想出让你们都觉得较安全的方法。
Stop Cheating
不要欺骗
There are no restrictions on one’s thoughts and there shouldn’t be. To think freely is a basic right that we enjoy. However to act upon your thoughts is a very different story. Relationships go through difficult phases and it’s during those phases that we tend to be susceptible, a little insecure and sometimes unhappy. If that is the case, talk to your partner. In case you want something different that your current relationship cannot give you, then have courage and break it off. If not, then do not break the trust you and partner share, for a moment’s weakness or on an impulse. It’s absolutely imperative that you treat your partner the way you want your partner to treat you. So be loyal.
思想是没有约束限制的，其实也不应该有。自由思考是我们应享受的基本权利。然而想是一回事，做又是另外一回事了。人际关系会经历困难的阶段，到了那个阶段，我们往往敏感，有一点点不安全感，有时还会不开心。如果是这样的话，和对方谈谈吧。如果你想要一些不同的东西，你们目前的关系却给不了你，那么鼓起勇气把这段关系结束。如果没有勇气，那么不要因为这片刻的软弱和冲动打破你们之间建立起来的信任。你希望伴侣能以你对待他的方式来对待你，这是绝对必要的。所以，一定要忠诚。
Stop Making His Decisions
不要帮他下决定
We all like to have a certain degree of say in our partner’s choices and decisions. It makes one feel special and important, but many times we can overdo. Remember how it feels when someone interferes with your decision making? Exactly. Don’t make his decisions for him.
我们都喜欢在对方做选择和决定时享有一定的话语权。这让人感到自己特别重要，但是很多时候，我们做过头了。当有人干扰你的决定时，你还记得那种感受吗？你肯定记得。所以请不要再帮别人做决定了。
